11..., Lifestyle, Style

11… Holiday Outfits

Happy Holiday Season and 11… 

I’m behind because the internet has sucked EVERYWHERE!!! I’ve also been disinclined to work. So here are 11… Holiday Outfits I Love. I wore them all this year. They’re cute and festive. 

1. Holly Jolly Pajamas
Okay… This Holly Jolly sweatshirt isn’t technically pajamas, but I love it! It looks so cute with the candy cane striped flannel shorts. Beau loves her jammies. And my socks kept me warm!

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2. Green Turtleneck Sweater Dress & Red Flannel
I love comfy yet festive. I do live in my pajamas, so sweater dresses feel like an extension of that. This cute green turtleneck sweater dress is amazing. I love tying a red flannel shirt at my waist. Over the knee black boots keep my legs warm, and a chunky hat keeps me cute and cozy. A sparkly touch is a cute pear shaped sapphire necklace and earrings.

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3. Vintage Burgundy Off-the-Shoulder Dress
I love this dress!!! It’s so cute and vintage. I’m always shocked when defined waist dresses actually fit me because I’m so tall. The green art deco earrings are gorgeous. Paired with silver heels and a rose gold watch, it’s perfectly simple yet classic and classy.

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4. Casual Green on Green
I am super obsessed with casual jersey dresses, flannel shirts, over the knee boots, and chunky knit hats. Obviously I combined them into a Christmas picture!

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5. Sparkly Candy Cane Dress
I LOVE THIS DRESS!!! Who doesn’t want a ridiculously sparkly candy cane dress for Christmas? Pair it with rose gold sparkle shoes to be extra disco bally. I love my new black glasses. A cute velvet bow and dangly earrings make it perfect.

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6. Backless Velvet Bodysuit & Taffeta Skirt
This was one of my favorite Christmas outfits last year. The burgundy velvet bodysuit is backless with black trim and it’s amazingly Christmassy!!! I also love the green taffeta skirt. Nude heels let the outfit shine. Pair with a cute rose gold watch.

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7. Cozy Statement Outfit
I love this outfit. It’s festive without being blaringly Christmas or New Year’s Evy. This purple satin skirt is so cute and comfy. I love pairing it with a chunky over sized sweater. Sparkly bootie heels are the perfect glam factor. My black glasses are nerd chic. An understated pink scarf and cute snowflake earrings tie it all together.

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8. Classic White
This is probably my favorite outfit ever. This white and black skirt is perfect, and it’s amazing to twirl in. I paired it with a simple white turtleneck. To make it festive and pop, red high heels.

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9. Vintage Green Dress
This is such a fun green, 50s style dress. It’s simple and comfortable. Paired with red high heels it’s very festive. Blue pear shaped earrings and necklace with a rose gold watch is elegant and cute.

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10. Buffalo Plaid
Buffalo plaid flannel shirts are so wintery. I love tying it at the waist with a black jersey dress. Over the knee boots and my smart watch make it a casual look for the winter season, while still being comfy and warm.

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11. Blue Tartan Wool Skirt
Wool skirts might be old fashioned, but they’re beautiful. I love this blue tartan wool skirt; it has pockets!!! A cute blue shirt, silver high heels, basic white earrings, and a silver watch make it wintery and festive without loud and obnoxious.

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bisous und обьятий,
RaeAnna

Blog + Dog

Couch Potatoes

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I’m getting a pep talk about how I CAN get all the stuff done I need to do.
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She just wants the treats in my hand… | Pajama Top | Pajama Bottom | Mug | Beau’s Bandana |

I’m a writer. Sometimes, I have a really hard time writing when I’m not inspired… I’m probably not alone in that predicament, which is why I am very happy to have a couch and  my dog. 

Luckily for me, I have an almost-comfortable couch and a very cozy dog. Not to mention more subscriptions to streaming services than is probably responsible, a ton of movies on Vudu, and loads of DVDs. Also more books on my reading shelves than I can read in four months. Actually, as I write this, I’m sitting on the couch with Beau under my arm watching The Man in the High Castle on Amazon Prime. (I highly suggest it; it’s based off the book of the same name by Philip K. Dick.)

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I promise. It’s not what you think it is… I dropped a treat in my lap.

Being a couch potato really works for us. Beau is particularly good at it. She takes up well over half of the couch at all times no matter how many people are wanting to sit on it with her. I like to refer to Beau as an oobleck – a non-Newtonian fluid; it’s a liquid until pressure is applied, and then it’s a solid. Beau starts in one position. She spreads out into another position; before, she solidifies and refuses to take up less space no matter how much pressure is applied. 

We’re very happy as couch potatoes. It works for us. Some days we get stuff done on the couch. Other days, we really don’t. 

Today, Beau and I have sat on the couch all day. It’s intermittently storming, and Beau is a little stressed about it. I feel like I haven’t done much, but I did. I wrote this boring blog post. I did the dishes. What took up most of my afternoon was mending clothes. I had a HUGE pile of clothes that needed to have zippers fixed, seams taken in, snaps put on, buttons reattached, straps tightened, etc. I’m actually quite handy with a needle and thread. I spent four hours doing all the mending that needed to be done and that had built up over an embarrassing amount of time. The upside, I have clothes back! And I did it all without leaving the couch! I can chalk this day up to a success.

bisous und обьятий,
Beau and RaeAnna

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Dinner, In The Kitchen

Shrimp and Grits

Shrimp and Grits

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Shrimp and grits is a southern staple. Depending on the region and the chef, the recipe varies drastically. Some sauces are similar to etoufee, a broth, a red sauce, or something in between. I like to make mine with a tomatoey, chickeny broth. I like to saturate the grits with as much cheddar cheese as physically possible because cheese is delicious. I’ve made this for friends and all over the country. As my grandpa would say, it’s a solid B+, which is high praise, and he requests it every time I visit.

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This is one of my favorite dishes to eat and make for people I love.

Ingredients

  • Shrimp (raw)
  • Scallops (raw) (Optional)
  • Mushrooms (Optional)
  • Brussel Sprouts (Optional)
  • Artichokes (Optional)
  • Bell Pepper (Optional
  • Garlic
  • Onion
  • 3 large Tomatoes or 8 oz package of cherry tomatoes
  • Bay Leaf
  • 3 tsp. Cumin
  • 1 tsp. Chili Powder
  • 1 tsp. Turmeric
  • 1 tbs. Honey
  • Olive Oil
  • 1 cup Grits or Yellow Cornmeal
  • ½ cup Milk
  • 1 tbs Butter
  • 1 ½ cup Water
  • 1 cup Cheddar Cheese (or more to taste) 
  • Salt/Pepper to taste

Instructions

  • Preheat oven to 400°
  • Chop mushrooms/bell peppers into bite sized pieces. Half brussel sprouts and artichokes. Place on a cookie sheet and coat veggies with olive oil. Sprinkle with salt and pepper to taste. Roast for 15 minutes or until browned.
  • Chop onions and garlic. Cook in sauce pan with 2 tbs. olive oil until translucent. Add in cumin, chili powder, turmeric, salt, and pepper. You can add more or less spices depending on your tastes. 
  • Chop tomatoes if using large/Toss in whole cherry tomatoes into the pan with the garlic and onions. Add one tbs. of water. Cover and let simmer for five minutes.
  • In medium saucepan bring water, milk, butter to a boil. Slowly add grits or yellow cornmeal, whisking constantly to avoid clumps. Let mixture come to a boil. Then, reduce heat to low, cover, and cook for 10 minutes. Stir often to avoid burning. 
  • Tomatoes should reduce and have a decent amount of liquid being very saucy. Add ½ cup water and stir to mix. 
  • Make sure to be checking grits. When the liquid is almost gone….
  • Add shrimp and scallops to tomato mixture. Cover. Shrimp and scallops should be thoroughly cooked in five minutes. 
  • Stir cheese into grits. Cover and set aside. 
  • When shrimp and scallops are done, add the roasted veggies to the tomato/shrimp/scallop sauce.

To Eat
Place grits in a bowl or plate, then ladle a generous portion of the shrimp/scallops/veggies tomato sauce on top. You can garnish with green onions or chives. Dig in!!!

Variation
You can always add in some andouille sausage to give it a NOLA kick or just add some extra yum.
I also love playing with the veggies you use. You can use as many or as few kinds of veggies as you want. In my opinion, the more the better!

 

11..., Lifestyle

11…

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I love watching nature. | Dress | Shoes | Sunglasses |
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My dog is my life. Don’t mess with her. | Pajamas | Headband |
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I will do many, many things for a picture for the blog. | Shirt | Shorts | Shoes | Sunglasses |

I’m going to be embarking on a lot of new things here …on the B.L. Because I love blogging and writing, but I want to do more of the things that bring me happiness and fulfillment. Books and book reviews are great, but I need to write about other more important-to-me things. The things I’m going to be writing about more don’t always exude happiness and rainbows. I don’t want to be a total downer because I spend most of my time laughing, so being Eyeore all the time on the blog would be an utter betrayal of who I am. 

On Mondays, or on as many Mondays as I can manage, I will be posting 11…, which is a new blog series I’m introducing today! It will be a list of eleven things, people, places, whos-its, whats-its, and randoms on whatever topic I decide to write about on that particular day. Most of them will be humorous, some will be informative, some will be dark, and there will be everything in between. For the very first 11… I will be talking about myself because I haven’t done a random list of things about me in a good while. So why not now!

  1. 5’10” I am super tall for a lady and technically for a man. The global average height for a man is 5’9”, so technically I’m better than over half the men in the world. Or at least, that’s what I’m telling myself. (I have tiny feet for my height: a size 7. This is directed at all the weirdos who message me about my feet on Instagram. Now you know, go away.)
  2. Musically Inclined Fun fact, I’m a classically trained pianist. I’m rusty, but it’s all there still! I can play the flute and was in a super select flute choir all four years of high school – I hated it and regret it, but it’s a fun(?) fact. I was also in choir in college – it’s how I met Alex of the many blog posts – and have a five octave range. My car singing is legendary, and everyone who’s experienced it is now deaf.
  3. Bollywood I have an undying love of Bollywood movies. In my dreamer’s heart of hearts, I want to be a Bollywood star. They make me happy when skies are grey. I have been obsessed since college. If I ever get the chance to be in a Bollywood movie, I would die happy. So please let me know if you know of an opportunity.
  4. PTSD I have it. It’s a long-ass story, and I will get to it, but today is not the day!
  5. Carousels I LOVE carousels. On my 23rd birthday, I made Kelsey (my best friend til death us do reunite in the place I will never again experience a chill) ride a carousel with me eight times. The only reason we stopped is because she gave me the look. If I see one, I will squeal, jump, and point. Words will not come out of my mouth, but I will grab your arm and tug – pull with great force in the direction of the carousel – to indicate I want a ride or twelve. 
  6. Polyglot Technically, I speak five languages. I’m a native English speaker. I have proficiency in French and Russian. I can get myself around the respective countries with my German and Spanish. 
  7. Chinese Food I believe with absolute certainty that Chinese food has magical healing powers. When I am sick or suffering from any ailment, Chinese food will help if not completely fix the situation. I have yet to be proven wrong. 
  8. Professionally Trained Ballerina For a very long time, I dreamed of being a professional ballerina. I worked super hard at it and didn’t completely suck. I ended up quitting due to injuries and being super tall and my parents’ poverty. I still love dancing more than just about anything. Fun fact: Ballerinas are not tall individuals. 
  9. Private Plane I secretly not so secretly want a private plane. This is absolutely unrealistic, I know. I want one because I want to see the world with my dog, and I think this would be far easier if we had a private plane because we could go wherever whenever without worrying about a dog on a plane with other people and their allergies. Really, it would be a public service. I did the math, I only need 99.99 million more dollars to responsibly buy a private plane and the staff it requires. I’m saving. 
  10. Pantsless I am pantsless 87% of the time because I’m a stay-at-home dog mom. Kidding kind of… I’m a dog mom, and I stay at home, but really it’s because I work from home. I’m a freelance writer, editor, and translator. It’s a great gig. I love it, even though my social life pretty strictly involves baby talk to a nonhuman. If you need a writer, hit me up. I promise I will try harder with your work than with my blog.  
  11. Three Majors and An Emphasis in Four Years I somehow managed to graduate college without ever checking into a hospital for exhaustion in four years with degrees in Literature, French, and Russian with an emphasis (basically a minor) in Literary Analysis and Translation. It’s basically a degree in reading super good. 

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In My Own Words, Lifestyle

Homecoming

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Welcoming Alex home with my sign. | Dress | Shoes | Watch | Sunglasses | Earrings |
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Happy hugs in front of his helicopter du jour. | Dress |
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Marines lining up ready to see their families.

No, I’m not in high school or college. I did celebrate Homecoming a week ago. By this point in your life, you’ve probably seen a movie or a YouTube video showing a military person (probably man because patriarchy) come home from deployment or war – technically deployment just less cushy and more PTSD inducing. There are lots of flags, running, hugs, kisses, and happy tears. It’s all very realistic. 

This deployment was never actually supposed to happen because he was supposed to get out of the military last October. Oh the military. You never know what’s going to happen until it’s already happened. Alex extended another year to go on this one. His two previous were to Japan and a bit of time on a boat floating around Asian countries. This one took him on a boat around the Mediterranean and an unplanned adventure in the Iranian neighborhood. With Flaming Hot Cheeto in office, it’s not exactly a time you want your loved one deployed in a less than friendly neighborhood. Six years. Three deployments. This was my first homecoming. Due to poverty, scheduling, and a lack of communication on not my part, I’d never been able to welcome Alex home with a cliché sign and a hug. 

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Yes that is a dinosaur behind us. | Dress | Shoes | Earrings | Watch |

Alex came home from his last deployment a week ago. I was waiting with a very me sign and a very big hug. It was not his longest deployment [upon Alex reading this: it was the longest. I guess I missed him less this time or I’m used to him being gone or it didn’t seem as long because we were able to talk more than any of the other deployments], but it was the most stressful, for me. Although, they are all stressful if I’m being honest. 

As in everything military related, there is a lot of hurry up and wait, which is the military’s unofficial motto, by the way; I should figure out what that is in Latin. Hurry up and wait all the way up until you hold them. 

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Alex’s helicopter as we wait and wait and wait to actually see them.

Homecoming is an emotional thing for families. I can’t explain to you what having someone deployed is like except it feels like your heart is torn in two, and one piece is somewhere in the world. You wait on phone calls and emails. You wait and wait and wait. Then the day comes when they come home. Make a sign (please make it original, I will judge you). Dress up. Pop a mint in your mouth because it has been seven months. Huddle with hundreds of other people in a hanger in 97 degree weather waiting to watch the helicopters come over the horizon. The room vibrates with anticipation and love and anxiety. The Marines corralling the families dictate where the boundaries are and say, “If you step over this line, you could die.” Terrifying to children and some adults, while also being completely overdramatic. You wait and laugh and chat and don’t step over the line. The glint on the horizon… just a bug. A glint on the horizon… a helicopter. Just kidding, not the helicopter. Is there time for a bathroom break? If you run fast. Don’t run! Wait. Jostle. A roar goes up. Helicopters are on the horizon. People scream and cry and wait. The helicopters fly over in a V formation. Look for the one your Marine is on. They land. You can see your Marine. Wait. They gather on the flightline and “march” towards us with as little panache as very tired Marines can muster. The loud speaker says an unknowable something. People rush forward over the line separating alive and possible death. No one dies. Some find each other immediately; others take awhile. After hugs and kisses and I missed yous and I love yous, Marines play a rousing game of where the fuck is my stuff? Because it is all piled into neat lines, but it’s government issued, so it all looks the same. Stuff is located. Buy a tshirt. Everyone carries something making your way to the car. Wait some more in the parking garage. Freedom. They’re home. 

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Three minutes in and I’m already goofing off. | Dress | Shoes | Earrings | Watch | Sunglasses |

I want this to be more emotionally charged than it is. But it’s not going to be. I can’t get sad or weepy or nitty-gritty honest about homecoming or this deployment because I’m not in that headspace. I don’t foresee myself being in that headspace in the near future. If you want something real and emotionally charged click here and read my post about military movies and my lack of composure watching them. 

I’m happy Alex is home. I’m happy he’s not dead. The likelihood he would die on the deployment was low, but you never really breathe easily when they’re away. I can breathe easily again. I’m sleeping better, which is to say as shitty as usual when Alex isn’t deployed. Deployments are hard. They suck. It’s emotional to have them deploy and emotional to have them come home. The interim is equally emotional. I think I’m tapped out on emotion right now, so this post is lackluster. I told Alex I had nothing interesting to write because he was lackluster, which is obviously not the case. No one spends six years loving a person in the military at a distance through deployments, deaths and illnesses, graduations and birthdays, anniversaries and holidays, normal days and hard days, when the one person you want by your side can’t be there. 

This is not a life I would have chosen, but I did choose to love him. I loved him before the military. I loved him through the military. I will love him after the military.

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Happy to have him home!!!
In My Own Words, Lifestyle

Military Movies

 

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I don’t crumble at much. Military movies make me crumble. I wasn’t always that way; they never used to affect me at all. When Alex started the enlistment process, I started to look at them differently. Up until that point, they were history, other people’s lives. Once the military started to creep into the edges of my life, military movies became the embodiment of my greatest fears. I’ve barely begun writing this and tears are streaming down my face. Having to think about this for longer than a moment feels like my lungs are collapsing on themselves.

The thing I fear most in this world is losing Alex. It’s the one thing that I don’t think I would ever recover from. I am genuinely uninterested in a world he does not exist in.

He left for bootcamp five and a half years ago. Since the day I stood waiving as his bus drove away, I have worried. I have lived with a deeply rooted fear that the last time I saw him will be the last time I see him. War movies are the worst case scenario, but he’s in the military. It’s a scenario planted solidly in the plausible. And in the political climate we live in, it feels like anything is possible. Things move slowly and wish-washy in the military, until they don’t. Then, they move incredibly fast. “Surprise! You’re going on a DET tomorrow for two weeks.” You never know for sure until it’s happening.  

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The fear worsens when he’s deployed. I’m lucky. I am so incredibly lucky. I have never forgotten that fact. He’s been deployed to really cushy areas. He’s on his third deployment. Hopefully his last. Even in the cushy areas, there are so many unknowns. Often times, I will go weeks and even months without hearing anything from him. More often than not, I don’t hear about things until he’s home. Let’s be honest, I don’t really know when he’s coming home until a week or two before. I once found out he was home when he called to tell me he’d arrived. We’ve missed Christmases and birthdays and celebrations for almost six years. I don’t care as long as he comes home. During his first deployment to Japan, there was a pretty awful tsunami, which they had to evacuate for. I found out about the storm from my best friend, who was watching the news. I didn’t learn about the evacuation until eight months after he was home from another MilSO. At the time, it was terrifying. They had no power, so no way to communicate. He was fine having a grown-man slumber party with his buddies in the barracks. But human nature takes us to the darkest, deepest recesses of our minds. I’m very much an Eeyore, so this has been a rough five and a half years in my dark, deep recess.

It’s hard not to worry when their job description includes a weapon. It’s one thing to go shooting in Grandma and Grandpa’s pasture with your dad’s childhood rifle. And a completely different thing to be issued a gun. They are trained. They practice. They aim. They breathe. In case someday they have to shoot. I am terrified of that day because it means someone else is aiming too. War movies remind me of this. They’re all guns ablaze, awesome explosions, a clear enemy, a clear hero. War isn’t that. It’s not that at all. It’s not for entertainment. War is terrifying. War is people against people, who all think they’re right. They’re all just fighting for the people they love at home. They’re young. They’re so young. Alex went in at 24, and that was considered “ancient.” Most kids go in at 18 on their first breath of freedom. It’s too young to die.   

War movies mostly show the military side of things in the thick of it. There’s more to it. There are the families. There is the after. I remember watching American Sniper when it came out. The scene where he’s on the phone with his pregnant wife, and she hears the gun fire on the other side of the world before the line cuts out. She crumpled. I crumpled. Alex was deployed at the time. I can’t imagine. I don’t want to imagine. That scene was one of the hardest for me to watch. Amy Schumer’s character in Thank You For Your Service is still my favorite of her performances. She donated her paycheck to TAPS and Fisher House because some people’s fears come true, and their service members don’t come home or come home forever changed. Us at home. We have stories. We have lives that keep going, but there’s a part of us pausing. Waiting to breath until the next email or phone call or hug. Worry. I’m good at worrying. Every time there’s an unfamiliar phone number from a distant place. Every day I don’t see his name in my inbox. Every single moment there is silence, there is an ache waiting to know he’s ok.

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Military movies put my fears on a big screen. They show all the crap, I don’t want to think about as a possibility. I don’t want to think about his death. What about mine? The military dictates my life in a way, but it dictates every part of Alex’s. They are away from us. They don’t know what’s going on at home. When I was 24, I was in the hospital for a long time in total organ failure. I was dying. The doctors told me to prepare myself and those I loved. Alex wasn’t deployed, but he couldn’t come. I didn’t know if I would live or die. I didn’t know if I would ever see him again. He knew I was sick and called as much as he could. I wasn’t able to communicate well, so I couldn’t tell him the extent of how sick I was. I also knew he couldn’t come, so I didn’t tell him how sick I was because it wasn’t going to change anything. I wasn’t going to make him worry. I remember laying in the hospital bed, and all I wanted was to hold his hand one more time. I would have given anything for him to be there. I was too sick for many tears to come, so I closed my eyes and prayed to a God I don’t believe in. To this day, it is one of the most painful times to recall because I needed him. He couldn’t be there. I wasn’t worried, but I was scared.

Alex works on helicopters. He’s on a boat. He’s somewhere in the world in the ocean. The likelihood he will ever have a gun pointed at him is pretty low. I am lucky. I am so lucky. Accidents happen. I know of so many cases where flukes happen and lives are ruined, ended. (I live with a life and body ruined by a fluke that happened one day on base in Jacksonville, North Carolina because of a helicopter. But that’s a story for another day.) Bad things can happen to anyone anywhere. The military just magnitizes that fear. Those men and women sign up willing to risk their lives. That is honorable and noble. They have my respect and support. The people who love them stand by hoping to never get the call. Service men and women may be willing to give the ultimate sacrifice, but I am not. I am not willing to sacrifice Alex.

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