I’ve been lazy. I haven’t been keeping up with blog posts like I intend to. So this is about three months after I visited Oak Alley, but better late than never. Also it’s super old. Things don’t change that quickly. The grass has probably been cut, and that’s about it.
Walking in the grass at Oak Alley Plantation in Vacherie, Louisiana. | DressRoots of a live oak and the big house at Oak Alley Plantation.
Oak Alley is just one of those places. It is absolutely stunning; so much so, it has become iconic. The grounds are an hour outside of New Orleans in Vacherie. Driving between NOLA and Vacherie gives you a good idea of what rural Louisiana looks like. What used to be a running plantation is now a museum with a restaurant and inn serving as a reminder of the American South’s unfortunate history.
Standing in between the rows of live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation. | Dress | Jean Jacket | Sandals
I remember driving passed Oak Alley at fourteen. My family was visiting relatives after Katrina, and we spent a day driving around the countryside outside of New Orleans. It was dusk when we drove by stopping just outside the front gate. The house was lit up from the outside at the end of a path lined by ancient live oak trees. It was magnificent, and a vision I will never forget. It wasn’t until I was in New Orleans for a bachelorette party a few years ago that I actually toured the plantation. The house is beautiful, but the grounds are the truly wonderful aspect. The plantation earned its name from the twenty-eight live oaks lining a walkway up to the front door of the house. It features a guided tour of the “Big House,” a slavery exhibit, a sugar cane exhibit, and more. There is a restaurant and inn on the grounds. The restaurant has some seriously amazing bread pudding. The gift shop also has some amazing pralines. If you’re lucky, you can have some warm and fresh.
View of the big house and the live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation.
Some of the oak trees are almost three hundred years old. The larger branches extend and drop to the ground. The roots are knotty and huge. Spanish moss grows on the trees. When the light hits them just right, it’s what bayou dreams are made of. Movies and pictures will never do it justice.
Roots and live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation.
Oak Alley was a sugar cane plantation built on the suffering of slaves. Sugar cane was known as white gold because of how much it was worth. Growing, harvesting, and refining was back breaking and dangerous. Slaves were bought and sold, so people could have their sugar. In those days, there was rich, then there was sugar cane rich. Oak Alley was the latter. The history goes back almost 200 years, but the live oak trees are even older than that. Walking the grounds is simultaneously enchanting and haunting. It’s difficult to think about how one place can be home to so much beauty and misery. All history is fraught with abuse, but it should never be overlooked. Remembering what really happened is an important part of embracing history.
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Axpona is one of those things you try to explain to your friends and they respond with “A what?” It’s a stereo convention in Schaumburg, Illinois. My dad went in 2018 and had a blast. We both love music, so he invited me along a year ahead of time for 2019.
I would love to describe this to you in a way that will do it justice, but I can’t. Dad explained it to me a year ago; I thought I had an idea. Nope. Axpona stands for Audio Expo North America and lasts three days. Audiophile paradise. It’s at a convention center-hotel combo. The ballrooms and convention rooms are full of headphones, home entertainment centers, accessories, records, and more. Seven floors of hotel rooms, every other room is home to a stereo, amp, speaker, wire, etc. company. You could truly spend all three days there and not see everything in a meaningful way. We spent two full days there and are still talking about the rooms we missed. Sunday was cut short due to April snow.
Growing up, my dad would pull out records and start playing them. “Listen.” I heard it often. Little me didn’t love listening as much as watching Dad light up listening and talking about music. As I grew up, I started down my own music journey. I love making it more than almost anything. My whole life, Dad has been introducing me to music and other people who stop by long enough to have a listen. A few years ago, he started building his own speakers and has a designated room. As a grown up, we’ll go back and forth playing music for each other. Our tastes are so eclectic, you really never know what will pop up.
I don’t know much about stereos. I know more now than I did because of Axpona. There was an overwhelming amount of audio stuff. Some things stuck out more than others. Here is my list of most memorable speakers. As I write this in my office, I’m listening to speakers I bought from the expo. I love them. Beau… Does not.
AvantGarde Acoustic – If I ever fall into a pot of gold. Hello, gorgeous. These are horn speakers. They are beautiful and amazing and expensive. They’re based out of Germany and took up the Presidential suite. The rep had some pretty awesome and varied music choices, which did nothing but help sell the speakers. The sound is open and pure in a way you don’t hear often. It’s as close to having the musicians next to you as I’ve ever heard. A side room had another more affordably expensive style of speaker, and those were just as amazing. It really is so impressive what the horns can accomplish. We ended up revisiting the room and staying awhile. If you ever have a chance to hear them, holy crap. They’re also artwork.
Vanatoo – These were a surprise. Based out of Washington, these are small speakers. I mean tiny. I have books that are bigger in size and weight. You spend two days walking around hearing big things with big price tags. Then, you walk into this room and go “huh.” They don’t require an amp or a subwoofer. There are two sizes small and slightly bigger. They’re plug and play. Perfect for apartments or offices. I loved that the rep had three short songs he played three times 1) on the small speakers 2) on the not-as-tiny speakers 3) with a subwoofer. It was great for comparison. Spoiler. These are what I’m listening to. They’re small and super impressive. They have rave reviews from people who know what they’re talking about and me. The small ones are $359 and the less small ones are $599. In stereo world: dirt cheap. I LOVE them. They are so easy to install and use. I have hooked them up to my TV and moved them around the house. They’re so good, and they can get REALLY loud. Not that I would ever do that to my neighbors…
Troy Audio – The sound quality was great! The reps had a great sense of humor. The room also came with tequila and chile mangoes. It’s a good sell. These are handmade and combine the classic 1940’s loudspeaker with modern technology to create a really unique sound. Not only is it beautiful and unique to look at, the sound is equally so.
Wilson Audio – I like to call this the keep dreaming room. Amazing. If you have a million dollars and change laying around a) feel free to send me some b) these are amazing. I don’t even want to talk about it because it makes my wallet hurt. The sound was pretty phenomenal. Impressive is an understatement.
MBL – These are unique. They weren’t the only omnidirectional speakers at the expo, but these were the most interesting to look at. You walk into the room and wonder where the speakers are because what your seeing looks like it could be a lamp, a non-functioning fountain, or a sculpture. Omnidirectional means the speaker doesn’t just project forward the way a traditional speaker does; it projects 360° to fill the entire room. I wouldn’t say they’re the best speakers in the world (they are good), but they are really cool.
MartinLogan – These are wild. My dad has talked about these before, so it was cool to see them. They’ve been around for 30 odd years and are based out of Kansas – go Midwest! They are very thin and translucent. Yes. You can see through them. They are an electrostatic loudspeaker, which means they are nothing like what I or you grew up with. They create sound through force on a membrane suspended in an electrostatic field. It sounds like science fiction, and it kind of looks like it too. The sound is truly amazing. The price ranges from ouch to if-I-had-a-real-job/didn’t-travel I could afford that.
Here’s the thing about stereo systems. You can spend a gobton of money. You can also spend $359 and get something fabulous. I’m listening to that right now. You can buy them on Amazon, here. I highly suggest. If money (and space) weren’t an issue, I would absolutely buy some AvantGarde speakers. There’s also a little bit of ridiculous to it. Spending $50,000 on a pair of headphones when my $125 headphones work is bonkers to me. To each their own, but I could buy a handful of other things and a nice pair of headphones for $50,000. It’s truly amazing what was at Axpona. This is audio equipment you absolutely cannot find at Best Buy or probably many other places. It would be far too expensive to have something like this in a showroom.
If you’re an audiophile: go. I can’t suggest it more. I already have Axpona on my calendar for the next year two years. So come say hi! I’ll be one of three ladies.
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Me posing with an overpriced lemonade in Houston’s Montrose neighborhood at a kitschy unicorn cafe. |Sweater|Scarf|Yogas
New theory. Instagram tax. No, it’s not just another new and terrible thing Instagram is doing, but it is a thing we are paying for as consumers and content creators. Places are cropping up everywhere with a visually appealing and stimulating aesthetic trying to be the next local must-be-seen local place. As a traveler and blogger, I have come across a ton of them here in Houston and all over. They’re fun, inviting, cute, and trendy. It’s fun taking pictures and posting from these places. Content creators are under pressure to be at these places constantly and always be on the lookout for the next one. It’s not just content creators who are on the lookout. Anyone who likes a cute picture for their feed is out and about. We’re all just trying to look cute. Cute is not cheap. These hotspots are not accessible to everyone, and they’re not meant to be. The market is targeting this need for cute content, and prices are rising because the demand will pay for that picture.
If you have spent any time around me, you are probably aware I don’t like spending money. I am a saver, a scrimper, a spend as little as possible kind of person. I don’t make a lot of money, and I have a travel addiction. I am picky where and what I spend ma monies. As a blogger, there are lots of things pulling me in a lot of directions. I love it. I hate it. I wish it were free.
Everything costs money. I live in the fourth largest city in the U.S. I know I’m going to pay more for dinner here than I would in small town Illinois. I like city living, and I’m willing to pay that price. Cities have a range, and that range now includes an Instagram tax. Aesthetic costs money. In the Insta-era, people are going places just for the picture with the thing. I’ve done it. I’ve spent more money on some things than I normally would because Instagram. I hate spending money. Sure it’s fun, but it’s fleeting. That lifestyle costs money I don’t have. Even if I did have it, I can’t justify spending $15 on an ok milkshake for the picture in the unicorn place. No thank you. I can make that shake at home. Instagram is all about aesthetic. I mean, I love aesthetic; it’s great. A coffee shop turns into a floral paradise. Why have a dessert shop when you can have a unicorn dessert shop? White, sleek, and modern. Go for it. Rustic, leather, and low to the ground. Have at it. There’s a niche for everything. Find it, design it, add $4 to every item.
Aesthetic is what draws us in. It’s what keeps us taking pictures and telling our friends about it. It’s CUTE! It may not make for loyal or return customers. Once you have the picture, do you really need to keep going back? Probably not. I have a picture of me eating ice cream out of a watermelon. I’ve not been back. Why pay $8 across town, when I like my $3 ice cream just down the street.
I have no problems paying market value for whatever it is I want. I’m kind of tired going to places to buy the thing to have the picture and paying double or triple the cost. It’s crazy stupid. No judgement. I will probably continue having those pictures when my friends go, but I’m not going to search them out. I search out the food not the look. I’d rather have $10 in my bank account than spending time in a poorly decorated unicorn dessert bar. Speaking of which. The picture was taken at a unicorn themed dessert bar in Montrose. It looks like a unicorn wet dream. Anything unicorn, pink, or sparkles is there. No continuity what-so-ever. My friend got a $8 lavender lemonade. It was fine, but you’re paying the Instagram tax. It has cotton candy and lights up. Not worth it. I borrowed her drink for the picture because I prefer plane tickets.
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My dad has an obsession with stereo equipment to the point he builds his own to my mother’s dismay. (Watching Deadpool with those speakers is definitely cool.) Last year, he went to Axpona in Chicago. He called me the night after and gushed for an hour about all the amazing stuff he saw. It was obvious to the deaf and blind he couldn’t wait to go next[this] year. I’m a little bit obsessed with my dad (if you knew him, you would be too), and I told him I would go with him. I have always liked spending time with him at activities he’s passionate about because he shares his wealth of knowledge with me. I know a bit about cars, and now I’m learning about sound systems. I made plans for this weekend a year ago.
Axpona, Audio Expo North America, is a three day convention for audiophiles. Read that as middle-aged men with money to spend on stereo equipment. The price tags range from ouch to holy shit. There are $50,000 headphones; no they are not gold plated or diamond encrusted. The stereos, amps, DACCs, etc. can be exponentially more expensive. I love music. I love making music. I love listening to music. But… How could these men* part with tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, of dollars on stereo equipment? I would have to have a gazillion dollars to even contemplate buying the high end stuff. (I’m also very cheap and contemplate if the coffee I want will actually bring me $4 of joy.) There is huge variation in style, engineering, function, aesthetic, and so much more. It is incredibly science driven and very interesting. The more you listen, the more nuanced and differentiated it all becomes. At the same time, they’re all pretty high quality. Most people would be happy with anything there. Still…. why?
We’re here for all three days. Half way through the second day, I started deep diving into what could make people spend that much money on a stereo. I have come up with two reasons. They have more money than they know what to do with. So instead of wiping their asses with $100 bills, they spend it on stereo systems. Fair. If I had a never ending supply of money, I would be going home with a specific system. A girl can dream. I don’t think many people fall into that category, though. Looking around Axpona, the population is predominantly middle-aged. I don’t say this disparagingly. They have more money than the young, and more time to enjoy the expensive stuff than the old.
I love this weird picture. It’s very us.
My life has a soundtrack. At almost 28 years old, there are songs that immediately transport me. Fergie’s Big Girls Don’t Cry takes me to the summer I turned 16. Chopin’s 24 Preludes is a rollercoaster of 12 year old feelings at being frustrated and angry at my hands and mother for making me fail at piano and eventually the love I have for piano because I practiced so much I’m still not terrible to this day. Elton John’s Your Song will forever be the image of my parents dancing on their anniversary in the living room of our bungalow in the last millennium. Vivaldi’s Four Seasons is the pride I had at having my first duet en pointe. S&M by Rihanna is a sarcastic college song I share with one of my close friends. I fell in love to Lonely Island’s I Just Had Sex. I always smile thinking about the time my dad taught me an inappropriate song at five with one line “it’s wrinkly and it’s crinkly.” I made my abrasive grandpa proud at eight playing Bluebell Waltz during my first piano recital. My life has a soundtrack. The songs are not all winners, but they immediately take me to memories, people, emotions of years gone by.
Wandering around Axpona, the music was primarily of yesteryear. I heard very little current music, which was fine by me. Genres and songs of all kinds. There was a lot of music rooted in the youth and young adulthood of the attendees, who were in their 40s, 50s, and 60s predominantly. When certain songs came on, they would all start bopping along a little more enthusiastically than before. Not just because it’s a good song, but you could see in their eyes a recognition of something personal not just great chords.
People aren’t buying stereos. They’re buying time. Years go by so quickly, and life is always shorter than we think. Music is a time machine taking us back to the time we first heard that song, what we were going through, the people we were with, or any number of things. Music, like smell and taste, is intrinsically linked with memory. We, as a world, do everything we can to stave off aging and death trying to grasp at what we had before. It was always better than it is now, it seems. Music doesn’t change our age or health or the fact we will die someday. It does have a profound impact on our souls. People aren’t just buying stereos. They’re buying a high quality time machine conveniently sized to fit in their living room. Not only does it look nice, it is the gift giver of history. Music is intimate and personal. Can you really put a price on hearing the song on the radio the first time you got behind the wheel without your parents or your first kiss or watched you child walk or won a trophy? Youth has a lot of downfalls, but those emotions were so powerful. Being able to throw back in surround sound from your very own couch can be absolutely intoxicating.
Axpona is an incredible experience. I didn’t think of myself as an audiophile when I began the weekend. I still don’t know a percent of the science or information that goes into the equipment. I learned a bunch, and I can impressive my friends with my rudimentary knowledge that is now a gazillion times more in depth than theirs. I realized my deep love of music makes me a novice audiophile. I found speakers I can afford, and I will probably be the proud owner of. I have a new obsession with a particular sound system I can’t fathom to afford. More importantly, I spent time watching my dad geek out over his passion.
I added a few more songs to my personal soundtrack.
*I say men because it is truly almost completely men. I honestly don’t think I saw a single woman there that was not there because of her husband. Truly 98.5% of the people attending are men.
When I was young, I couldn’t wait to be old enough to wear bikinis. Then, I got old enough and didn’t love them so much. I felt exposed. Then, I got even older, and I just don’t give a fuck anymore. I love swimsuits because they mean I’m at the beach or by the pool. My apartment has a pool, and I don’t spend as much time by it as I should. When I first moved to Texas, I had very few swimsuits. Now, I have a whole bunch. It didn’t stop me from buying a few more for my cruise last month, though.
I found several from Asos and JustFab and Target. I love one piece swimsuits; being as tall as I am, they are kind of hard to find. So I have a renewed love in bikinis. I’m a huge fan of high waisted bottoms because I can binge on shitty food and not feel totally exposed. Here are all the swimsuits I brought with me on my cruise. I definitely overbought, but that’s fine. They are all on sale, and I adore all of them. Truly. They look so cute!
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Worth A Read Most Definitely Length 352 Quick Review A deep dive into gender, race, relationships, and what it means to grow and be human. Jodie Patterson confronts it all when she realizes her daughter is her son, Penelope.
The Bold Worldby Jodie Patterson is wonderful. Honestly, I loved it. I had never been heard of her before reading the book, which is nice because I don’t have any preconceived notions. All I really knew was it was about being a mother to a trans son. Yay! Supporting women and the LGBTQIA people! It’s what I’m all about, plus I love reading and educating myself about these things.
About more than just her son, The Bold Worldis absolutely Jodie Patterson’s story. She begins with her early life and family. There is a commitment to family in every page of this book. Patterson allows herself and the people in her life to be as complex as people are prone to being. Never sidestepping the contradictions, feelings, pain, confusion of humanity. Anecdotes are relaid with a matter-of-factness, which leaves no room for question. It happened. She manages to communicate her self-love and mistakes without ever being apologetic for either.
Courageous is how I would describe The Bold World. It takes a brave heart to lay out the complexities of being woman, of being black in America today. To openly struggle with being a strong black woman and a mother of trans son is another level. Opening up about the ups, downs and absolute mystery of mothering well in a world that too often vilifies different is courageous. It is heartbreaking and overwhelming hopeful all at the same time.
The topic of transgender is still such a new concept for so many people. Jodie Patterson is helping to tear down the walls separating normal and other in The Bold World. It is inspirational and necessary. Not only does she tackle trans-issues, she talks about skin color, gender, sexism, family, motherhood, marriage, and being human. It is a remarkable story told with grace and hope.
Memorable Quotes “The South, I knew had the power to fix anything. There was spirit in the soil.” “…sometimes the king is a woman.” “this correlation between money and control, where control is in the hands of men, and women are often excluded, or minimized, from the conversation.”
