Books, NonFiction

Under Red Skies by Karoline Kan

Worth a Read Yes
Length 320
Quick Review A memoir about growing up under the one-child policy in China as a second child and the collision between traditional and modern values.

20190421_162852-01.jpeg
Under Red Skies by Karoline Kan at Iowa State University in Ames. | Shorts | Shirt | Sandals | Sunglasses |

For many of us, it’s hard to imagine living in a world where there is a ban on how many children you can have.* It is even harder to imagine one’s existence being illegal. Karoline Kan grew up in both of those realities. She documents her coming of age story in her memoir Under Red Skies.

Chinese history is not common knowledge for most Americans. Tiananmen Square might ring a bell if you were really paying attention in history class. Thankfully, Kan starts Under Red Skies off with a brief historical timeline starting in 1945 with the Chinese civil war to ground the reader in the history affecting the world she grew up in. Most people are aware of the one-child policy in China. For the most part, the effect that policy has on the people probably does not come to mind. Kan’s mother wanted a second child and did everything in her power to make it happen, which is why Karoline Kan is in this world.

The women in China endured a great deal of hardship because of the one-child policy. Kan bore witness to forced sterilization. She was there when the government kidnapped her mother to force her into a tubal ligation. Surgeries were done by non-qualified doctors in outdoor tents. Many women became ill and suffered lifelong difficulties due to these procedures. Some women even died. The first year, 1983, more than 16 million women were sterilized.

Communism rocked the foundations of the Chinese culture. Under Red Skies touches on a great deal of her experiences. Religion was banned; people were arrested, reeducated, beaten, and even killed for having religion. Hukou was a fundamental part of Kan’s growing up. It defined where people lived and where they could go. Essentially, hukou defined who they were. People very rarely amounted to any more than what their family’s had. Kan’s parents worked hard to make sure she and her older brother were not as limited by hukou.

Under Red Skies is about more than just the one-child policy. It’s about growing up in a changing time. With the advancement of technology, life in China was changing. Traditional values clashed with modern values. Kan was born in 1989 and grew up in a time of change. She grew up to become a journalist and a writer. Sharing her story and the story of so many other people.

Kan writes a moving and brilliant memoir. Her experiences are incredibly unique as a second child during a time where that was wrong. She is also incredibly relatable but does not shy away from the gut wrenching details of her childhood. Under Red Skies is a beautiful testament to love and dedication.

*Considering everything that is going on in the U.S. states of Alabama and Georgia where abortions are all but banned. Limiting the number of children a person or couple can have is the exact opposite of what is happening.

Memorable Quotes
“Globally, the voices of young Chinese – especially those of young Chinese women – are often neglected.”
“Scholars believe 30 to 60 million girls “disappeared” because of the One-Child Policy.”
“China was far from being a free country.”

Buy on Amazon | Buy on Book Depository

Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3583620″]

Title: Under Red Skies
Author: Karoline Kan
Publisher: Hachette Books
Copyright: 2019
ISBN:9780316412049

Books, NonFiction

Last Boat Out of Shanghai by Helen Zia

Worth A Read Hell Yes
Length 544
Quick Review An intense look into the challenges of emmigrating during the mass exodus from Shanghai in the midst of the communist revolution in China of 1949.

20190505759757279415923220.jpg
Reading the book Last Boat Out of Shanghai by Helen Zia | Asos Dress

Chinese history – and Asian history for that matter – is so basically covered in the United States. If you want to know about non-white history, you have to educate yourself. It’s Asian American Pacific Islander Heritage Month; coincidentally, I’ve been reading a lot of books by and about Chinese/Chinese-Americans. Great timing. Last Boat Out of Shanghai by Helen Zia is a beautiful tribute to the men, women, and children who lived through the exodus from Shanghai.

People were leaving Shanghai in droves during the ‘40s as a reaction to the turmoil going on within the country after the Japanese occupation and the rise of Mao and the communist party. Zia focuses on four people’s lives before, during, and after the exodus in Last Boat Out of Shanghai. Benny, Ho, Bing, and Annua lived very different lives, but they were all affected. Benny was the son of an affluent comprador family. Ho grew up well-off in a large extended family compound. Bing was abandoned, adopted, abandoned, and adopted all during the uproar in China. Annuo grew up with two highly educated and revolutionary parents. Each of these people have their own very interesting tale about struggle and survival. Zia gives them each their own spotlight while intertwining their stories.

201905055456252443112434926.jpg
Reading Last Boat Out of Shanghai by Helen Zia in Houston | Asos Dress

I have so much to say about this book, but I would be giving the story away. I have a particular affinity for Annuo because she spent time in Ames, Iowa, and her brother earned a PhD from Iowa State University. Last Boat Out of Shanghai gives an emotional depth to the intense era. China was recovering and reacting from years of difficulty and occupation. Trying to find its way and identity to an ever changing world. Zia begins each person’s story before the communist revolution in their childhoods and follows them through their adolescence and adulthoods after fleeing Shanghai. Their lives began and ended differently, but they all went through the struggle.

I completely consumed this book. I have always had a love for history and the individuals who live and create it. These four people show their extraordinary resilience by surviving. Helen Zia is able to bring a humanity to the stories and history found in Last Boat Out of Shanghai, which was the General Gordon by the way.

Memorable Quotes
A message was sent via a photo “If he was standing, all was well. If he was sitting, things were bad. When he finally sent them a picture, he was lying down.”

Buy on Amazon | Buy on Book Depository
Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3571150″]

Title: Last Boat Out of Shanghai
Author: Helen Zia
Publisher: Ballantine Books
Copyright: 2019
ISBN: 9780345522320

Books, NonFiction

Work Wife by Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur

Worth a Read Yes
Length 208
Quick Review Work Wife by Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur explores the unique relationship between female duos as company founders and how these duos are changing the workplace.

20190421_155404-01.jpeg
Work Wife by Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazure | Bird Cage Veil

Women and men are different. Whether that’s due to nature, nurture, or a combination is up for debate – and not likely to be figured out any time soon. There is one very evident thing, we work and lead differently. Where men tend to compete and fly solo, women tend to support and congregate. Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur are cofounders of the company Of a Kind and cowriters of Work Wife inspired by their own work wife relationship.  

Cerulo and Mazur were college friends long before they began their Work Wife journey. After moving to NYC and having individual careers, they decided to mesh their passions into one company: Of a Kind. Their friendship was the foundation of their company, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t face all the hurdles every startup faces. Instead of going it alone, they were able to lean on one another and still do to this day. Work Wife chronicles their journey as cofounders, but it also looks to other iconic female duos leading companies of all sorts. They wanted to highlight there is more than one way of being a duo or even a trio in a leadership position. There is no set way of being successful as a female leader but many.

Work Wife talks about several high profile duos and trios. These women are uber successful in their spheres. If you do any reading about women owned businesses or leadership or friendship, these women will inevitably crop up. I am familiar with all of their names because of this. I think it’s fabulous. Also a little sad that there are so few women in leadership roles, and we have to keep using the same women on repeat. It just proves we can do it, and there is a need for more of us. Obviously.  

20190421_160129-01.jpeg
Work Wife by Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur

Cerulo and Mazur approach Work Wife with humor and friendship. There is a ton of great information, but you can sense their relationship and sense of fun coming through in their words. There is a great amount of admiration for each other. I love the sense of collaboration. There is very little ego; though, they do tackle some of the issue that come with the money and percentage side of things – not so cheery and rainbows. One of the biggest takeaways from Work Wife, which transcends business relationships: How partners talk in meetings is an indicator of their relationship and the health of the business. Are they competing? Or are they supporting, listening, and building off one another. This is such an important thing to take into life and other relationships. You can even see this in how they write the book. They speak in the third person “Claire…” or “Erica…” and then switches back to “we,” which is the guiding force behind the book. They are a united force. Other important topics they touch on for women: how men and women deal with money differently, motherhood, communication, regular meetings with a coach, how things tend to come out in the wash.

The writing seems very them. I don’t know them, but it would be hard to make up that playfulness. They write using the acronyms they undoubtedly use in day to day life. In partnership, it’s important to have a short hand. One thing I found a little redundant was the constant reminder of who each woman was. The other duos and trios of female partnerships are mentioned so consistently, it is hard to forget who they are. I do love that they included a profile and portrait of the duos at the very beginning of the book. I like having faces to go with names.  

I want to end on this quote: “Female hysteria may no longer be recognized as a medical condition, but the stereotype – and the reliance on it as a tool to silence and discredit women – persists. Having someone to validate perceptions help eradicate the self-doubt that can ratte even the most confident among us.” It’s a central theme in Work Wife and life. As a woman there is always the fight against centuries and milleniums of oppression and stereotype. It’s been a long battle, but I think we’re starting to make some head way, in great part to the work and openness of women like Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur.

Memorable Quotes
“At its core, our friendship was built for two.”
“Following your gut is the one hard-and-fast rule of forging a work-wife partnership.”

Buy on Amazon || Buy on Book Depository
Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3561277″]

Title: Work Wife; The Power of Female Friendship to Drive Successful Businesses
Authors: Erica Cerulo and Claire Mazur
Publisher: Ballantine Books
Copyright: 2019
ISBN: 9781524796778

20190421_155438-01.jpeg

Books, NonFiction

Life Will Be the Death of Me by Chelsea Handler

Worth a Read Yes
Length 256
Quick Review Chelsea Handler’s never been afraid of the truth. In her latest memoir, she sits with personal trauma in a way she has not before. Laugh out loud funny with a serious edge.

201904158711232425615044081-01.jpeg
Photo shoots with a dog are exhausting. Life Will Be the Death of Me by Chelsea Handler isn’t.

I love Chelsea Handler. I have read several of her books and watched her TV show fairly religiously. When I saw she had a new book coming out, I had to have it. Life Will Be the Death of Me is still laugh out loud funny, but she tackles her mental health in a serious way.

Chelsea Handler has made her living making people laugh. I think it’s easier to make people laugh in person than on the page, but I have always been giggling with my nose in her books. Life Will Be the Death of Me deals with death in a serious way. Her brother died when she was very young, and that experience changed her and her family forever. Throughout the book, she talks about her grieving process several decades after his death. She visits a psychiatrist, who helps her work through her issues.

201904152136245016373270425.jpg
We can be cute. I had to hide a treat in my cleavage….

I love her writing style and voice in Life Will Be the Death of Me. She’s one of those people whose voice shines through anything she touches. It’s probably one of the reasons she is so successful. I think for the first time in her books – I have not read all of them, don’t quote me – she spends more time being serious than being funny. Her honesty and self reflection are brilliant.  

201904155353288759104339138.jpg
She’s not eating the apple. Treat in my hand. She’s eating my hand.

My two favorite parts of Handler’s memoir are this quote: “How can it be that a swab of saliva can determine a dog’s genetic heritage yet there isn’t a more precise way to determine the age of a dog at this juncture in modern society?” We are both rescue dog moms. As the proud mama of a rescue dog, I identify this on a very deep level. I wish I knew the age of my dog, but I do not. Also one running theme throughout Life Will be the Death of Me is her anger towards Trump. There is a lot, a LOT of anger being funneled in his direction, and I love it. I personally think almost all evil is his fault, at this point in time. Darth Cheeto sucks donkey balls.

If you want some laughs and some insight. I say check out Chelsea Handler’s latest book Life Will Be the Death of Me. If nothing else, you’ll giggle a few times, and there are really cute pictures of her dogs and family.

Memorable Quotes
“Having an older brother is a lot like a crush – in fact, it is a crush.”
“No person is just one thing.”

Buy on Amazon | Buy on Book Depository
Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3559402″]

Title: Life Will Be the Death of Me
Author: Chelsea Handler
Publisher: Spiegel & Grau
Copyright: 2019
ISBN: 9780525511779

201904101309600183581456119.jpg
What a winner. Dog butt.
Books, NonFiction

The Art of Leaving by Ayelet Tsabari

Worth a Read Yes
Length 336
Quick Review Ayelet Tsabari was born and raised a Yemeni Jew in Israel. The death of her father was a catalyst leading her into a transient lifestyle always leaving for her next “home.”

201904167767243408484079527.jpg
The Art of Leaving by Ayelet Tsabari | Romper | Black Pumps

The Art of Leaving is an apt title for this moving and sometimes cringe worthy memoir. What can be seen as a memoir about leaving people and places can also be read as a search for belonging, home, and being seen. People yearn to belong to someone, somewhere. Ayelet documents her life of wandering around the United States, loving, gaining citizenship in Canada, roaming Southeast Asia, returning to Israel, becoming a mother. She is not only leaving people and places, she’s leaving herself. The parts she doesn’t like, the parts she doesn’t want in her narrative, the parts that other people have forced upon her. Tsabari yearns to belong in the world and in her own skin. 

Tsabari grew up in the Tel Aviv area of Israel. She was the daughter of a beloved lawyer and the second youngest in a large family. At the tender age of ten, her father passed away. She spent her adolescence rebelling and searching for an identity while simultaneously flaunting and avoiding the stereotypes hounding her as a Yemeni and a woman. She joined the army as all Israelis do; instead of being a good soldier, Tsabari pushed all the boundaries and buttons (literally). After completing her time, she left. Exploring life in foreign lands, she did what many young people do: experiment in many ways. At one point landing on a beach in Goa, India, she didn’t even own shoes.

I had no idea about the racism in Israel towards people of Yemeni heritage. The Art of Leaving greatly opened my eyes to a culture and country I know very little of. The plight of Yemenis in Israel is reminiscent of the treatment of blacks in the United States; different, of course, but similar. Tsabari references childhood bomb shelters and gas masks like they were as every day as an ice cream and a swing set. Maybe, they were.

Tsabari touches briefly on the irony of her very Jewish urge to wander and find a home when her home is Israel in The Art of Leaving. Jewish people wandered for centuries searching for a place to call home with no success. She wanders with the same yearning of her ancestors. She looks for a home for her body and a home for her soul. 

201904163312654307695428449.jpg
In Chicago’s Little Italy | The Art of Leaving | Romper | Pumps 

I loved how Tsabari writes her memoir. It is very much in the present even though the events are in the past. The syntax and tense pull the reader into her life, identity, and crisis of being. There is a transparency between herself and the reader. She has no qualms about looking back into her diary and stating she wrote a story she could live with. Human. Reshaping stories and lives to fit in a pretty box. Her narrative was not the only narrative reshaped with years and in memories. Her great-grandmother was demonized and hated. Life is rarely as simple as walking away. Life and stories are complex and layered. Many of Tsabari’s life choices are questionable at best and downright stupid at worst. That’s the point. We all make choices in moments without thinking or ignoring what should be done. Tsabari took her own path and doesn’t apologize for it. I always admire the unapologetic even when I want to save them from their mistakes, which you can’t do. Saving people doesn’t really exist. 

The Art of Leaving is a very personal, unique, and beautiful memoir. Even though she grew up under very unique circumstances, her story is very relatable. Many people wander with the need to find home.  

Plot hole question: What happened to your feet??? I need to know!

Buy on Amazon || Buy on Book Depository
Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3549014″]

Memorable Quotes
“…they are proof that you don’t have to stop traveling to grow up.”
“Leaving is the only thing I know how to do.”
“Stories to her were luxuries, like dreams and regret.”
“I never feel that much anymore, which I suppose is the trade-off for not falling apart.”
“I didn’t want to become someone else. I wanted to be me.” (Motherhood)

Title: The Art of Leaving
Author: Ayelet Tsabari
Publisher: Random House
Copyright: 2019
ISBN: 9780812988987

Books, NonFiction

Mother Winter by Sophia Shalmiyev

Worth A Read Yes
Length 288
Quick Review A meandering memoir. Shalmiyev talks about the dark side of growing up with an alcoholic mother and the scars that never go away.

201904153473527912663709598.jpg
Mother Winter by Sophia Shalmiyev | Jeans | Sandals | Shirt | Sweater

Mother Winter by Sophia Shalmiyev is one of the most interesting memoirs I have ever read, and I have read a lot. I’m drawn to memoirs because life isn’t defined by a single event or truth but the culmination of all experiences. Everyone has their own ever evolving truth, and memoirs are a beautiful exploration of that. Sophia Shalmiyev looks back at her life and how so much of it was affected by her alcoholic mother even after leaving the country and starting a new life.

Mother Winter reads like poetry. It doesn’t necessarily make sense at first, but in its entirety, it is a beautiful story. Shalmiyev was born in Russia during the communist years. Her parents divorced, and her father raised her due to her mother being an alcoholic and unfit to parent. Even so, Shalmiyev never stopped looking, thinking, or yearning for the mother she lost. In her youth, she left the USSR to make a home in the United States.

I speak Russian. I have a fairly vast knowledge of the history, literature, and culture because I studied it in college. For me, the language and culture was very accessible. It’s interesting to know the history of a country and government juxtaposed against the personal experience of a young girl. I love how Shalmiyev transliterated some Russian words instead of translating them; it granted a more insight into the culture.

The prose in Mother Winter is not straight forward. The chapters weave and jump, backtracking and side-stepping. It is a very complicated organizational system, which could have failed miserably, but instead it is the perfect fit. The reader gets lost and regains themselves in the text, in a way similar to Shalmiyev felt, I can only imagine, as a child in Russia between homes and again as a young immigrant in America. Discombobulated in the best of ways. I love how eloquent and transcendent her prose is; then, suddenly there is a bluntness to her sentence where there is no room for misinterpretation. On of my favorite passages can be found on page 46 and 47. Shalmiyev cuts through the bullshit.

She weaves USSR history into her life giving the reader context and understanding of what she went through. She blends history, science, feelings, memories, anecdotes, adjective strings, third person narration, quotes, directives to her mother, and so much more. The amount of knowledge Shalmiyev includes extends from literature, medicine, philosophy, science, and history – I probably missed some.

Mother Winter is an absolute joy to read. I loved it from a personal stance because of the Russian component, but it is also the story of a mother and a woman surviving. I absolutely cannot recommend this book more.

Memorable Quotes
“Yesterday has never ended.”
“a book like Henry and June roasted my throat with the fear that tough and smart doesn’t protect you from subservient and used up.”
“Goods are damaged often by no fault of their own.”

Buy on Amazon | Buy on Book Depository
Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3548770″]

Title: Mother Winter
Author: Sophia Shalmiyev
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Copyright: 2019
ISBN: 9781501193088