RaeAnna Rekemeyer – Page 65

We Should All Be Feminists

February 2, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 52
Quick Review: An essay about the importance of feminism. Beginning as a Tedx Talk, Adichie redefines feminism for the new generation of feminists.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is one of my favorite authors. If you’re a repeat reader, I’m sure that is clear already. She is one of those writers you cannot ignore. With her unique voice and story telling ability, she has grabbed the attention of the world. I found her about a year ago, in which time, I have read the majority of her works. (I only have Purple Hibiscus left to read.) I am rereading We Should All Be Feminists again because it is just that good.

For the majority of the world when the word feminism is uttered, people immediately and solely think of it as something applying to women or even cared about by women. Feminism is seen as benefiting women.

Adichie begins her essay with a few examples of the differences women face in the world based on their gender. She also turns the idea of feminism on its head by explaining the benefits feminism has for men and boys as well. Without feminism, culture is a hindrance to men because they must conform to the idea of masculinity and “stifle their humanity.” Although Adichie discusses the positives of feminism for men, it is more important for girls. Without feminism women spend their lives defining their place in the world by their relationship to men.

Adichie writes succinctly and effectively. There is a fire in her words fueled by anger and hope. She is one of the most talented storytellers, but she is incredibly gifted as a nonfiction writer. Her novels and short stories take the reader to another place, but her essay grounds the reader in reality. Adichie lets the reader get to know her a little.

I can’t recommend We Should All Be Feminists more. The essay should be mandatory reading for everyone. It is an amazing, concise, and quick read. Taking less than half an hour. Sit down and read it the moment you can!

Memorable Quotes
“… both of us bristling with the half-baked knowledge of books we had read.”
“At some point I was a Happy African Feminist Who Does Not Hate Men And Who Likes To Wear Lip Gloss And High Heels For Herself And Not For Men.”
“But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.”
“… it is one thing to know something intellectually and quite another to feel it emotionally.”
“There are far fewer guides for men about pleasing women.”
“And then we do a much greater disservice to girls, because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males.”

Title: We Should All Be Feminists
Author: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Publisher: Anchor Books (Random House)
Copyright: 2012/2014
ISBN: 9781101911761

Lifestyle

Dear Black Women

February 1, 2018 RaeAnna

Dear Black Women,

Happy Black History Month!

I have a small yet growing following on social media. So I’m going to use that platform to talk about something all month long that is really, really important to me: you.

I am a feminist. I am a white woman. My feminism includes you. My feminism is inclusive.

Women have to deal with some real bullshit. There are some upsides, though. Having to deal with being treated like less, working harder to prove we’re equal, being observed as sexual playthings years before it’s appropriate, and more because there’s a lot bullshit. We’re humans. We deserve respect. We deserve to live our lives our way without fear or judgement or interference from people who have no idea who we are.

I’m white. Those are my experiences. I’m writing this to you because you have different experiences. You don’t have the privileges I do. You have to live life in a way I never will. You have to take precautions I never will. You have to deal with microaggressions and racism I never will. You have to deal with discrimination and harassment and sexuality in ways I never will.

I’m sorry you have to go through that. I wish it weren’t your reality.

Sadly, this world is nowhere near postracial. I love that people think since we had a black president *poof* racism, finito! Those people died the moment Obama was elected because things are not ok. We – as a country, I didn’t – voted Darth Cheeto into office. Unfortunately, 53% of white women voted for that ass hat wearing mongoloid. (I hate using language like mongoloid but yikes, he’s deficient and it’s dated.) We live in a world where #blacklivesmatter is controversial. WHAT??? Ugh. (Just so we’re clear, I’m pro #blacklivesmatter.) We live in a world where black boys and men and women and children are dying because of the police. We live in a world where 1 out of 3 black males will be incarcerated at some point in their lives. We live in a world where black women wearing their hair natural is seen as a political statement. We live in a world where black women are angry and black men are dangerous. I think the only time I’ve ever heard a black woman yell in real life is at step competitions. Let’s just say, the only men I’ve seen with guns are white. This list can go on and on and on.

We all have biases. That can’t be avoided. I’m sure I have been insensitive. I hope if I am someone points it out to me, so I can learn from that experience. The thing is we can learn and do better and change and make this world fair for our children and our grandchildren. But it takes making an effort, learning, and communicating. We have to take ownership of the past and the present. (This is more of a white people issue.)

It’s sad that we have to have Black History Month. IT SHOULD BE DISCUSSED EVERYDAY!!! It’s important. Your history is my history because we’re people, we’re Americans. We need to recognize the faults we made and the faults we make. If it’s not part of the discussion how will we learn?

This month is an ode to you. Every day, I will post on social media about a fabulous black woman past or present. Narrowing it down to 28 is rough. Some may be famous, and some may be friends of mine. I think it’s important to recognize the accomplishments of women and especially black women because if we see excellence achieved by people similar to ourselves we know it’s possible. If we know it’s possible, we won’t just dream. We will act and be amazing ourselves breaking down gender walls and racial walls. Every success made by a woman and a black woman is a step forward for all of us no matter how small.

Women need to stand together. We have no chance if we don’t. Historically, white women have always benefited from the oppression of woc (women of color). Feminism has been historically white centric. When “women” were fighting to work, woc had been working for years because they didn’t have a choice. When “women” won the right to work, they depended on the low wages of woc to do the things around the house they were no longer doing because men didn’t pick up the slack. White women have benefited from the inequality.

Black women have been the leaders in change but never received any credit. A lot of the actions, ideas, and more that helped gain freedoms for white women originated in black communities… but no one cared until a white voice spoke it. A whole bunch of fashion, music, dance, etc trends over the past centuries, which have been popular in the US, have roots in black communities. Yay cultural appropriation… Totally fair and not at all offensive.

Dear Black Women. You are seen. You are important. You are spectacular. You matter. Your experiences are significant. Your voice should be heard. You are worthy. You are smart. You are funny. You are complex beings with layers upon layers of emotions, experiences, actions, dreams, and more. You deserve the best. You deserve the right to be yourself. (I hate telling women they’re beautiful because there are so many other things I can and should compliment them on, but I don’t think you hear it enough.) You are beautiful. You are a knockout just the way you are.

Love,

RaeAnna
Founder of Bookish Liaisons

P.S. I’m hoping white people read this, and learn something. We can always learn something. I have lots to learn.
P.P.S. To other nonblack women of color. You also matter!
P.P.P.S. Dear White People. If you find yourself angry: good. You obviously need an education. Also there are opinions in here that are my own. The facts I talk about are facts. They cannot be refuted. You may try; I will block you. I hope you learned.

Books

The Mockingbird Next Door

January 30, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 278
Quick Review: Marja Mills is one of the few people who knew Harper Lee intimately. She tells her tale of moving in next door to get to know the aging reclusive author.

Nelle Harper Lee penned one of the greatest American novels: To Kill A Mockingbird. Fame came swiftly to the small town woman. After a few years in the limelight, a Pulitzer Prize, and an Academy Award Winning film, she withdrew from public. She refused interviews and autographs. As the decades passed, she became an enigma.

Marja Mills wandered into Monroeville, Alabama on an assignment for her Chicago newspaper. She knocked on Nelle’s door expecting it to never open or to be sent away. Instead, she met Alice Lee, Nelle’s older sister. What happened in the following minutes would altar Mill’s life and the world’s perspective on a beloved author. Mills met Alice Lee, close family friends no one had access to previously, and eventually Harper Lee. For some reason, Lee liked and trusted Mills from the beginning and allowed her unprecedented access. Over time, their relationship grew from acquaintances to close friends. Mills had health problems, which caused her take time off from her job in Chicago. She used that time to get to know Harper Lee and her life.

I wasn’t expecting the book I read. The title The Mockingbird Next Door made me think it would be about Harper Lee. Instead it was Mills memoir about her time spent with Lee. As wonderful as Mills is, I would love to learn all the secrets of Lee’s life. I did enjoy the book for what it was.

It is evident from the beginning, Mills has a deep affection for the Lee family. Lee never opened up to anyone outside of her close family and friends. There’s the sentiment that Mills can barely contain her excitement she was let into the close circle of friends.

Mills writes authentically. She tells the story of Harper Lee honestly. There is a lot of reverence for the great author, but Mills makes sure the reader knows the humanity of the author.

Memorable Quotes
“Methodist or Baptist, Alabama fan or Auburn. These things mattered. They determined who your people were.”
“And that was something she cares about, deeply: the ability to live her life on her own terms. She answered to nobody.”
“How does anyone live up to the mystique that had grown up around her?”

Title: The Mockingbird Next Door; Life with Harper Lee
Author: Marja Mills
Publisher: The Penguin Press (Penguin Group)
Copyright: 2014
ISBN: 9781594205194

Books

Edith Wharton

January 28, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: No
Length: 869
Quick Review: A thorough and insightful look into the life and writing of an influential, female author.

Edith Wharton is an author known for her realistic social critiques of the American upper echelon’s wealth, morals, classicism, and more. Her use of language captured a way of life that was both disappearing quickly and unattainable to the majority of Americans. Wharton had a unique insight into the New York City aristocracy because she was born into high society.

Wharton is one of my favorite authors and has been for a long time. I first fell in love with her writing while reading House of Mirth and Age of Innocence. They are both wonderful and classics. One thing I didn’t know about Wharton but learned is her love for dogs. She cites receiving her first dog as a child as a pivotal moment in her life. As a dog mama, I completely and totally identify with this sentiment.

Edith Wharton was born in New York City in 1862. She was much younger than her two older brothers, which caused her to view her childhood as one filled with solitude. Between the ages of four and ten, she lived in Europe. Upon returning to New York City, she could never shake the feeling of otherness, which would often crop up in her work thematically. The feeling of being an outsider would eventually allow her to critique the aristocracy so poignantly. Wharton was a writer from the very beginning. She began publishing work in her teens but disappeared from the publishing world for many, many years. At the age of 23, she married Edward Wharton. After 28 years of marriage in 1913, they divorced. She didn’t begin publishing until the later years of marriage that Wharton began publishing. Wharton would spend a great deal of time in France and spoke French fluently but with a heavy accent. She passed away in 1937 in France, her preferred home.

Hermione Lee explores the life and work of Edith Wharton in a mere 870 pages. Edith Wharton was extensively researched and written with precision. Lee relied heavily on Wharton’s work for biographical clues and sites lengthy passages from her work. Lee sites so much of Wharton’s work that the book feels more like a textual analysis than a biography. Vast majority of the time, it was difficult wading through all the passages and analysis to find out about the historical information about the woman who penned the words originally.

I can understand why Lee cited Wharton’s work so heavily. Much of Wharton’s life is a mystery because she was incredibly private. She destroyed her correspondences and asked for the recipients of her letters to do the same. In her autobiography and memoir, she was not always truthful in her self portrayal. Turning to Wharton’s work is an obvious and helpful way of circumventing the research challenges.

Memorable Quotes
“The gift of her first small dig at the age of three was evidently as life-changing an event as her first publication, or her first car, would be.”

Title: Edith Wharton
Author: Hermione Lee
Publisher: Alfred A. Knopf
Copyright: 2007
ISBN: 978037540009

Books

All the Single Ladies

January 26, 2018November 4, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 339
Quick Review: An in depth look at the transformation in status, perception, and participation American women have undergone in society through the centuries.

20180115_111033(0)-01.jpeg — All the Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister

Rebecca Traister had me hooked when she stated, “I always hated it when my heroines got married” within the first few paragraphs. All the Single Ladies is a look at modern women and where we have come from.

All the Single Ladies is a fun yet in depth look at the history of women with a focus on American women. There are tons of statistics, but you won’t drown in them. The statistics serve a purpose to educate but are still interesting. Traister utilizes her own single life as well as friends, colleagues, and others’ experiences as single women. One thing Traister conveys more than anything else is that singledom is incredibly diverse looking different for everyone.

Traister is not anti-marriage, anti-male, anti-woman, or anti-single. When she began her journey writing this book, she was a single woman living in New York City. At some point in her life and book journey, she met a man. She is now a married woman with two daughters.

This has been on my reading list for awhile since I am a single lady. For as excited as I was, I was also a touch tentative. Rebecca Traister is a white woman. There is nothing wrong with this. When looking at a subject, there is the tendency to look at people similar to oneself. I was worried there would be a deficiency of inclusivity and diversity of perspective, socio-economic background, race, etc. I was pleasantly surprised. From the beginning, she states that she sites more white, New Yorker writers than most of us probably know. Throughout the book, she does a good job of talking about all women and not just those she identifies with. She spends a great deal of time discussing the disparity between white women and women of color, poor women and middle class/wealthy women, and more. She explores the fact women of color and poor women have enabled wealthier classes of women “freedoms.” How there is a dependency between the two discrepancies. How white women have lead change by co-opting opinions and actions of women of color.

Traister spends a lot of time emphasizing the complexities of women’s issues.

Nothing Traister wrote was groundbreaking. At least, it wasn’t ground breaking or remotely shocking to me. I spend a lot of my time listening to women’s stories and reading about the history and complexities of women’s status in society. If it’s not something you have spent a great deal of time lingering on, there will be lots of information packed into a fairly short book.

(I have fun finding mistakes, and she had one mistake on page 153: the date should be 1938 but reads 1838. Oops! Only off by 100 years.)

I highly suggest this book. It’s interesting and fun. Personally, it rejuvenated my love of being a single woman in America. I would love to hear Traister’s opinions about women’s status post the 2016 presidential election.

Buy on Amazon || Buy on Book Depository

Memorable Quotes
“…these single American women have already shown that they have the power to change America, in ways that make many people extremely uncomfortable.”
“Any time women do anything with their lives that is not in service to others, they are readily perceived as acting perversely.”
“When people call single women selfish for the act of spending on themselves, it’s important to remember that the very acknowledgement that women have selves that exist independently of others, and especially independent of husbands and children, is revolutionary.”
““It takes a lot to qualify a man as selfish”” Amina Sow
“The state must play its role in supporting a population that no longer lives and dies within a family unit.”
“at the heart of independence lies money.”
“When it comes to female liberty and opportunity, history sets an extremely low bar.”
“women’s maternal status is often treated as the singularly interesting thing about them”

Title: All The Single Ladies; Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation
Author: Rebecca Traister
Publisher: Simon & Schuster Paperbacks
Copyright: 2016
ISBN: 9781476716572

Books

Go Set A Watchman

January 20, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 278
Quick Review: Jean Louise – Scout – Finch is no longer the little girl we know and love. She is a grown woman returning home to her beloved Maycomb, Alabama.

Published in what could be called a scandal, Go Set A Watchman became accessible to the public 55 years and three days after the publication of To Kill A Mockingbird. Nelle Harper Lee wrote Go Set A Watchman, but revised it into an entirely different book most every American has read, which won a Pulitzer. It would be hard to imagine Harper Lee as a public figure, but in her early years she was. Due to the drains of fame, she receded from the public eye never to publish again. In her old age, Go Set A Watchman was published under a great amount of scrutiny as to if this is what she really wanted. The reviews flooded in quickly. They were mostly skeptical and rarely glowing.

I never read To Kill A Mockingbird in high school. I read it one summer in college. I enjoyed it, but I didn’t love it the way others do. It took me over two years before I bought Go Set A Watchman because of the circumstances it had been released. Its blue spine sat untouched on my shelf for several months before I finally picked it up to read.

I understand why people didn’t love this second Lee book. I, however, did. I wish I could talk about Go Set A Watchman without talking about To Kill A Mockingbird, but they are intrinsically linked not only by their characters but by the integral part To Kill A Mockingbird has played in the landscape of modern Americana.

Scout is no longer a little girl; instead, she is a grown, college educated woman of 26 living in New York City. She is known as Jean Louise, and she’s going home to Maycomb for two weeks. A lot has changed in her hometown. Atticus has gotten older, but he has stayed the same. Jean Louise is an adult on her own in the world. Go Set A Watchman is a coming of age story. The kind that is rarely told: the difficulty of separating one’s identity from that of their idol’s. As people, we all go through it in one way or another.

I can understand why so many people have a hard time with this book. They’re comparing it to the first. It’s easy to do. The characters are present. The setting has only been phased by the passing of time.

The narrative of To Kill A Mockingbird flows forward through time; it’s easy to follow. Go Set A Watchman has a completely different rhythm. Jean Louise isn’t living in the present. She bounces between the past and present as memories are triggered. The book is well organized but anecdotal. It is a completely different reading experience than what one goes in believing it will be.

Atticus is a hero to Scout in a way he is a hero to everyone who has read him. He’s even, educated, fair, loyal, true, just, kind, and more. He is an ideal of a person we strive to become someday. I always found him to be too perfect. I didn’t love him because he seemed flat. Too good to be true, in a way. I want my heroes flawed, human. Go Set A Watchman rips holes in the perfect man. Lee portrays him as human, as a man of his time, a good yet flawed man. All the while, Lee portrays Scout as a young idealist with grit. Scout stands up for what she sees to be right under the most difficult of circumstance: she doesn’t back down when her hero disagrees. It becomes tenuous when Scout compares Atticus and Maycomb to Hitler and the Russian communists saying, “You just try to kill their souls instead of their bodies.” (Ouch!)

Scout replaces Atticus in our mind’s eye. She is the one who will go out into the world working to create a better and more just place for all. She believes in equality and opportunity for all, in helping, in tearing down walls based on gender or class or sex, that silence is support, and more. Jean Louise is no longer six years old; she is a young woman coming into her own in a world being torn further and further apart.

I think in many ways, Go Set A Watchman is more relevant today than To Kill A Mockingbird. We live in a world torn by intolerance and hate based on so many things, and sometimes the impact is felt most acutely in our own homes. As unfortunate as it is, many of the scenes playing out in front of Jean Louise’s eyes are familiar to the ones I see today. The relationship Scout has with her father is incredibly similar to the one I have with my father today. Many can relate to feeling betrayed by those we love when we find out their views fail to reach the standard we have set for them while failing to realize they are human too.

Go Set A Watchman has created waves. Many people do not feel for it the way they feel for the predecessor. I think this is a large part of its magic. It dares you to see a character and a book in a new light, no longer through rose colored glasses. Atticus is seen through the eyes of a child in To Kill A Mockingbird, but he is seen through the eyes of an adult in Go Set A Watchman. As children we see the world one way and another way as an adult. Lee makes us return to a favorite with the eyes of an adult.

Memorable Quotes
“Integrity, humor, and patience were the three words for Atticus Finch.”
“The course of English Literature would have been decidedly different had Mr. Wordsworth owned a power mower”
“They are simple people, most of them, but that doesn’t make them subhuman.”
“Prejudice, a dirty word, and faith, a clean one, have something in common: they both begin where reason ends.”
“You just try to kill their souls instead of their bodies”

Title: Go Set A Watchman
Author: Harper Lee
Publisher: Harper (HarperCollins Publishers)
Copyright: 2015
ISBN: 9780062409850