Worth Reading Yes
Length 225
Quick Review Trump governs one of the most powerful countries in the world. His niece, a clinical psychologist, posits he doesn’t deserve any of the praise he’s garnered for himself.
Mary L. Trump is the oldest of Fred Trump Jr.’s children and Donald Trump’s only niece. With a doctorate in clinical psychology from the Derner Institute of Advanced Psychological Studies and a lifetime of anecdotal experience, Dr. Trump explores the complicated familial history that made the youngest Trump, an undiagnosed yet dangerous narcissist with complex pathologies, in her book Too Much and Never Enough; How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man.
Before becoming president, Donald lived a life of luxury, but that luxury masked a childhood and life filled with too much and not enough. Donald is one of five and the second youngest child of Frederick and Mary Anne Trump. He, like his four siblings, had a difficult childhood. Their father was cold, domineering, and manipulative, and their mother lacked warmth and had little role in the two youngest Trump’s lives. He, like his siblings, suffered from emotional neglect, causing a lifetime of irreparable damage.
Too Much and Never Enough is more than Donald’s story. It is the story of Dr. Trump’s family, her father, herself. She humanizes Donald by giving context to his inexplicable behavior. His personality, though outlandish and atrocious, is explainable. There is a reason Donald is the way he is, “Child abuse is, in some sense, the experience of “too much” or “not enough.”” Dr. Trump contextualizes childhood development and attachment and how everything went wrong in his particular situation, “…Donald suffered deprivations that would scar him for life.” Donald didn’t experience this abuse in a vacuum, it went back generations and existed for all the children in varying ways and was passed down to the next generation and experienced by Dr. Trump herself. As he grew older, Donald lashed out more and more as there was “… an increasing hostility to others and a seeming indifference to his mother’s absence and father’s neglect. … With appropriate care and attention, they might have been overcome. Unfortunately for Donald and everybody else on this planet, those behaviors became hardened into personality traits…” Into adolescence and adulthood, these traits would affect everyone in his orbit and eventually the globe as he took on one of the most powerful political positions.
Family dynamics affected Donald, but they affected everyone else in the family as well. Dr. Trump wants her family’s story to be told. Her father passed away a disinherited, family disappointment at 42 from alcoholism. Family dynamics affected Dr. Trump. Even though she was born into a family worth multi millions, she had plead for college tuition. Of all the people in the world, Dr. Trump has as many if not more reasons to eviscerate Donald, yet she makes it known from the beginning that she is not writing this for financial gain but to elucidate Donald’s pathologies for the world at large. Though I believe her motivations, the book still feels rushed. Spreading the word before the campaign or a combination of capitalizing on it, means redundancies and a little bit of the “not enough.” Given more time, the narrative could have been improved.
Donald, like every person, is a culmination of everything he endured and survived. Dr. Trump humanizes him through reasoning. She provides excuses without releasing him from culpability because he is an adult responsible for his actions. She repeatedly bolsters her arguments through facts, statistics, anecdotes, and quotes. What could have strictly been a family tell-all is a well researched look into her family’s history.
Dr. Trump never refers to Donald as Uncle or president. He is always Donald. The entirety of Too Much and Never Enough, she keeps her family at a distance and only refers to them by their first name. When she does to their relation, it is solely to contextualize who they are to her and within the family.
There is a sense of humor to Too Much and Never Enough. In the chapter titled “A Civil Servant in Public Housing” or the phrase: “Unfortunately for Donald and everybody else on this planet, those behaviors became hardened into personality traits…” Dr. Trump finds a way to lighten the mood, even if it’s just for a moment.
Diagnosing Donald is impossible. Dr. Trump begins Too Much and Never Enough by saying she can’t diagnose him because it would require a battery of tests and cross-sectional diagnosis that he would never sit for. Through reading, you can get a sense of what she believes his diagnosis could be if he would ever admit he has a problem.
As infuriating as Too Much and Never Enough is, it is a lovely book about the horrible Trump family. Their failures, shortcomings, and history. For Mary L. Trump PhD, it is a story of overcoming and succeeding. Donald Trump is one of the most dangerous and powerful men in the world, but at the end of the day, he is a man who has suffered greatly.
Memorable Quotes
“The fact is, Donald’s pathologies are so complex and his behaviors so often inexplicable that coming up with an accurate and comprehensive diagnosis would require a full battery of psychological and neuropsychological tests that he’ll never sit for.”
“It’s difficult to understand what goes on in any family – perhaps hardest of all for the people in it. Regardless of how a parent treats a child, it’s almost impossible for that child to believe that parent means them any harm.”
“Nothing is ever enough. This is far beyond garden-variety narcissism; Donald is not simply weak, his ego is a fragile thing that must be bolstered every moment because he knows deep down that he is nothing of what he claims to be. He knows he has never been loved. So he must draw you in if he can by getting you to assent to even the most seemingly insignificant things. … Then he makes his vulnerabilities and insecurities your responsibility: you must assuage them, you must take care of him. Failing to do so leaves a vacuum that is unbearable for him to withstand for long.”
“Donald was to my grandfather what the border wall has been for Donald: a vanity project funded at the expense of more worthy pursuits.”
bisous und обьятий,
RaeAnna
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Title: Too Much and Never Enough; How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man
Author: Mary L. Trump PhD
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Copyright: 2020
ISBN: 9781982141462