Bookish Liaisons – Page 17

Invest in Books and Friends

March 13, 2018 RaeAnna

Happy Feminist Friday!

I think two of the most important things women can invest in are books and friendship. These two things have a lot in common. They’re both time consuming. They cost. Books cost money; friends can cost money (going out, gas, etc.). They are absolutely priceless!!!

Books
Well, I obviously think these are one of the most important things anyone can invest in. Not like I’m a book blogger or anything…

Books for a really, really, really long time were inaccessible. They were expensive to make. Then the Gutenberg Press happened. Woohoo! Technology helped make the production of books simpler, faster, cheaper, which allowed more books into the world creating more authors and more readers. Before the Gutenberg Press, you had to be super rich or clergy to have books. The other big reason books were inaccessible for so long: literacy. The only way you learned to read was if you were – again – super rich or clergy. Rates of literacy began to rise after books became more accessible………..

I forgot to mention one teensy little thing. Previous paragraph is pretty much just about men. Women reading, yeah that, it’s a new thing. Women didn’t read. They weren’t taught. Education was a thing for men. Educated women? They existed… Very few and far between. That history is loooong.

Anyways, books are important. It’s still a fairly new phenomenon. There are still many places in this world where reading is rare, but I’m lucky to live in a place and a time where reading is easy and inexpensive!

Women should read because knowledge is power. Enough said.

Friends
Friends are super important. Books are not my only friends. I wouldn’t say I have tons and tons of friends. I have several really close friends. I am beyond blessed to have each and every one of them.

Funny enough, books have lead me to several of my friendships.

My best friend and I met in the library at college. We both worked there. I was a senior; she was a freshman. It was her first day of college, and it was my last first day of college. I trained her. One thing lead to another, and she has never gotten rid of me since.

My blogger bestie, Maria, and I solidified our friendship over books and reading and the general accumulation and discussion of knowledge. We lived on the same dorm floor our freshman year in college – a handful of years ago, now. We met and hit it off pretty much immediately. I would love to say books were the catalyst, but it was a combination of books and fashion. We LOVE both. Fast forward a handful of years. We had fallen out of touch because life. We kept tabs, but hadn’t talked or seen each other in YEARS. Living on opposite sides of the country, we each entered the blogosphere within months of each other, literally two. She is a fashion/lifestyle blogger: Millennial Fashionista. I am a literary/lifestyle blogger. We support one another. We chat often. We share blogging woes and highs. Books brought us together many years ago, and books helped rekindle our friendship. Click here to see us in action on her page!

Friendship is such an important aspect in our lives as people and women. It’s important to have a support system. Friends provide a place to be our weird selves.

Books and Friends. My two favorite things!

Books

Winter Garden

March 7, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: No
Length: 394
Quick Review: Meredith and Nina think their old, Russian mother hates them, but on their father’s death bed everything changes. A mother-daughter mystery couldn’t be more generic.

As a Russian speaker… This book was incredibly painful to read. As an English speaker… I found it mundane and common at best.

Meredith and Nina are sisters following vastly different paths. Meredith stayed home to help run the family business as her father aged. Nina left for adventures as a photographer. Their childhood was marked by a father’s unconditional love and their mother’s frigidity. A fairy tale they heard as children transformed into something meaningful to their mother and their own lives after their father dies suddenly.

Hannah tries to build a beautiful picture in the reader’s mind, but falls short as she uses too many unnecessary adjectives giving the narrative a clunky, arbitrary feel. Her efforts feel amateurish as she becomes overly repetitive. When she refines her language, everything flows better, but these moments are fleeting throughout the almost four hundred pages.

The characters come off as flat, grating, unempathetic, and overly stupid. Spoiler: The mother is an elderly, Russian woman with a heavy accent. The plot takes place in 2001. If I could VERY easily do the math: Woman. 80 ish years of age. Her heavy accent means she did not leave Russia as a child but an adult. Even if she moved to the US as a 23 year old woman, she would have been in Russia during WWII… Which explains all of her behavior. So… In the 37 and 40 years her daughters had with her, they didn’t even think about her life before them. I have a hard time feeling sympathy for adult characters who live in me-me-me land, which is exactly what the main characters here do. Not to mention their inability to view the “fairy tale” as an allegory for their mother’s life. As children, all of these things are excusable, but as adult characters it’s surprising and not believable.

Hannah has an obsession with “unconditional” love throughout the narrative. Every time the word “love” is used it is almost always in conjunction with “unconditional.” It just irritated me. After the first few times, she could have dropped the word since she was referring to family and not an “unconditional love” of dirt.

All in all, the book was a waste of my time. I had the plot guessed in detail within the first thirty pages. It’s a formulaic mother-daughter relationship story with an even more uninspired mystery for good measure. As a non-Russian speaker, I would have been able to forgive her, but I’m not that. She fell short. It’s a lesson in how one should only write about languages they’re familiar with.

Memorable Quotes:

“She had thought she was full grown then.”
“”A woman can be a girl and still know her own heart.””

Title: Winter Garden
Author: Kristin Hannah
Publisher: St. Martin’s Press
Copyright: 2010
ISBN: 9781615239498

Lifestyle

This Feminist Wears Heels

March 2, 2018 RaeAnna

Happy Feminist Friday! I’ll write on this topic every so often because it’s important, and I read a lot of books with strong female characters and feminist undercurrents.

My feminism is intersectional and inclusive and all about equality. No one is better than anyone else. We all deserve the same rights and opportunities. I don’t care if you’re female, male, trans, gay, straight, bi, liberal, conservative, religious, non-religious, have similar beliefs, think I’m full of crap or everything in between. You all matter. You all deserve respect. You are all part of my rainbow, and you’re all beautiful. I have said it before. I will say it again. I will repeat it until I die. And I hope it’s something people remember about me.

This feminist is a hard core feminist. I believe we should all live our lives however we want to live our lives. I will never push my beliefs on you, and I hope you give me the same. I will never judge a woman or man on how they lead their lives.

This feminist LOVES heels. I love dresses. I love… well I like makeup. I love clothes. I love looking nice. I love having long hair. I love having shaved legs. I love bows and pearls and lace. I love cooking. I love baking. I hate cleaning. I love taking care of those close to me. I love to sew and knit. Actually, I’ll probably take care of anyone crossing my path who needs it. I love kids. I love men. I love ballet. I love music. I love art.

I live a life that screams conservative to those who don’t know me well because I am attracted to very stereotypical female activities. I’m very liberal, but I feel comfortable in the choices I make. They make me happy. The thing is: I have the choice to enjoy the things I enjoy. I wasn’t forced into them. I’m not pressured into them. When I don’t want to cook, I order in. When I don’t want to bake, I don’t bake. When I don’t want to wear heels or makeup or a dress or whatever, I wear sweats and flip flops.

I have the privilege and ability and education to live my life the way I want to live it. Sure, I experience pressures to be a certain way, but I have the confidence to live my life my way. My way wears heels.

Books

The Last Black Unicorn

February 27, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 288
Quick Review: She is hilariously funny and heartbreakingly honest in a memoir about her uphill battles to a little bit of money, fame, stability, and happiness.

I had never heard of Tiffany Haddish until Christmas, which is unsurprising since I live under a rock. She knocked my socks off in Girls Trip. I just had to read her book.

I read The Last Black Unicorn last night in one sitting in under a few hours. She is funny finding the humor in some of the darkest hours of her life. I can completely identify with her sense of humor. She used laughter as a survival and/or defense mechanism. Comedy was her way out of a life that could have ended in a million different ways of bad.

Haddish doesn’t shy away from the dark in her life with a cut and dry style. Her life is filled with concepts and feelings so many struggle to name and describe, but she lays them out in the world. Her childhood was filled with an abusive mom, an absent father, foster care, sexual abuse, physical abuse, homelessness, racism, depression and more. She was able to use her talent for entertaining to gather every experience and hardship and rise above. She succeeded when everything in the world was against her.

I knew she had had a rough childhood. I knew she was a comedian. Most comics write over the bad stuff with a sense of humor. Haddish wrote funny, but she also did not gloss over or try to make things funny that cannot be funny. She embraced the hard.

Haddish writes the way she talks. Her voice is evident throughout the entire novel. It’s hard not to feel a certain camaraderie because she’s talking to you. Allowing you to enter her internal dialogue and love her flaws and quirks and insecurities. She comes off as this confident woman, but under all the self-assuredness, she is still fighting to prove and explain her existence to everyone and herself.

I just want to give her hug. I don’t know if she likes hugs, but she deserves all the hugs.

Memorable Quotes
“Hurting myself made them stop hurting me and care about me.”
“I was eighteen. To survive, I had to quit comedy.”
“I wanted to be in the gang, because I felt like then I’d be a part of something.”
“When you ruin a black man’s shoes, you never know what’s going to happen.”

Title: The Last Black Unicorn
Author: Tiffany Haddish
Publisher: Gallery Books (Simon & Schuster Inc. )
Copyright: 2017
ISBN: 9781501181825

Books

The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl

February 25, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length: 224
Quick Review: Issa Rae has entered our homes and hearts as the quirky, awkward, lovable, black girl through her YouTube, writing, TV show, and more. Her book makes her even more relatable.

I am behind on the times, so I discovered Issa Rae about four months ago when I binge watched Insecure. I immediately fell in love with her writing, acting, and message. As a self-proclaimed bookworm/nerdy girl, I could completely relate to her bathroom mirror pep talks and internal dialogues. The cover of her book intermittently popped up on my Instagram feed since I started, and after watching her show, I put two and two together. So I ordered her book.

The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl is honest. One of the more, honest memoirs. She tells things straight (as straight as personal memories can be). Her sense of humor drenches the novel with gripping laughs. She is self deprecating in the way only someone who is truly comfortable in their awkwardness can be.

Rae pulls you in with her familiarity and wit. The words “black girl” in the title lead me to believe the book would be fairly politically charged. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Rae has her moments of political and cultural commentary, but for the most part she just tells her story, which being a black girl is a central element. Blackness is a central theme throughout her book. She emphasizes the importance of not having a black cookie cutter because one size does not fit all.

At only 200 pages, it is an incredibly quick read definitely worth your time.

P.S. Issa Rae… I LOVE Tootsie Rolls. Like really love Tootsie Rolls. I was the kid that dove for them at parades. Thinking of which, I was the only kid diving for them at parades. I have also dated Asian men. I had never thought of it until you brought it up… but I guess there is a correlation. Which means! Like Asian men, Tootsie Rolls are under-coveted.

Memorable Quotes
“The gamut of “blackness” is so wide.”
“Black women and Asian men are at the bottom of the dating totem pole in the United States.”

Title: The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl
Author: Issa Rae
Publisher: Atria Paperback (Simon & Schuster)
Copyright: 2015
ISBN: 9781476749075

Books, NonFiction

Year of Yes

February 18, 2018 RaeAnna

Read: Yes
Length:
Quick Review: Shonda Rhimes owns Thursday night and lives in Shondaland. But she wasn’t happy, so she embarked on a year of saying yes.

Shonda Rhimes grew up in Chicago, graduated from Dartmouth then USC School of Cinematic Arts, and went on to write movies in Hollywood. In 2005, she launched her first show: Grey’s Anatomy. She went on to create several more shows. Today, every show on ABC on Thursday nights she has brought to life.

Rhimes begins her memoir with a disclaimer, which states she is old and a liar. She loves lying. She’s a professional liar. Because… it’s her job! She’s a writer. Playing make believe is her job. No matter how much she loves lying, she’s keeping it real in her memoir. She then has a prologue about the events leading her to her year of yes. Then her book begins.

Rhimes is a successful woman of color in Hollywood, which is still rare. She was unhappy even though she seemed to have everything: a job, money, TV shows, success, power, family, friends, and three beautiful daughters. She decided to spend a year saying yes to the opportunities that came her way. As the year progressed, she began to notice her quality of life changing.

I can personally identify with her childhood as a bookworm and potential, future writer. As a child, she used to shove books down the back of her pants, so she could sneak off and read. When I was little, I couldn’t wait to own a purse. At 10, I bought my first purse; it was big enough to hold a book, and that’s all I ever carried in it. I now carry huge purses because I still bring a book everywhere.

The thing I loved most about Year of Yes, is how real Rhimes kept it. I want to be her friend, quite honestly. She cut the crap. She let people in showing her fragility. She’s a single mom. How does she do it? With help. She is incredibly shy and has stage fright. How did she get over it? She said yes to Jimmy Kimmel.

Year of Yes is her memoir, but I found it so empowering. I don’t want to mom, but her words on motherhood were beyond touching. I wish I could memorize her pseudo-rant because it was perfect. She’s inspiring as a F.O.D. First. Only. Different.

Shonda Rhimes is a remarkable woman with so much ahead of her. An entire generation grew up with her TV shows. I still remember the very first night Grey’s Anatomy aired. She has impacted a shift in television and the way we see the world. She is an inspiration even before reading her book. It’s important for our role models to be something other than perfect. Rhimes tears down the walls of her perfection revealing a woman with faults and imperfections. She’s allowing a whole generation of young women, who look up to her, to be human with bumps in their personalities realize they too can be an F.O.D.

Memorable Quotes
“Sometimes the toilet paper does not win.”
“I am never more sure of myself about a topic than when I have absolutely no experience with it.”
“We’ve all been taught to shame and be shamed.”

Title: Year of Yes; How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun and Be Your Own Person
Author: Shonda Rhimes
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Copyright: 2015
ISBN: 9781476777122