11..., Lifestyle

11… Ways to Be a Better Antiracist

The Black Book is one of the most moving and heartbreaking books I have ever read.

I am not the first person to come up with a list of ways to be a better antiracist, and I won’t be the last. You should look up others because I’m sure they are better. Obviously, this is a list of things you can do written by a white lady with a lot of white privilege who is on her own imperfect and perpetual journey to be a better antiracist. 

This post is titled “… Better Antiracist” because hopefully you’re already on your antiracist journey. If you are not, WELCOME! Now is the perfect time to start your journey. 

  1. READ. There are so many wonderful books, articles, stories, etc. written by Black writers, educators, activists, etc. who have made it their life’s work to educate. You will learn so much from them. Also buying and reading their books supports them and their work. It tells publishers and academia to be more inclusive, to publish more Black authors, to support the Black community. All you have to do is scroll through my book reviews to find some really great books. Or just google it. (Google is a great resource, use it.)
  2. EVALUATE YOURSELF. The hardest thing to do is admit fault or complicitness. We’re all racist. It’s ingrained in society. That doesn’t make it okay. When you have feelings or apprehension, ask yourself why. Evaluate what you do, your feelings, your thoughts, where you live, what you read, what you watch, everything. It takes time and effort. Being self-aware is hard, but it makes us better people. The more good people in the world fighting for equality and justice, the better the world will be. Be a part of the change, and that change starts within. 
  3. DIVERSIFY YOUR FEED. More than likely, you found me through social media. Social media is amazing. I love how it connects the world. It is also a way to maintain our safe bubbles. If you only follow people who look and think the way you look and think, you’re not challenging yourself to be better. How many BIPOC people do you follow? Seriously, go take a look. I had this realization a few years ago after reading a book (see point 1), and the first thing I did was go and follow writers, bloggers, actors, people of color. It’s important. And so easy. 
  4. DIVERSIFY YOUR LIFE. How many people of color are you friends with? This is harder to change because it takes more of a conscious effort, and a lot of times. It might even mean going pretty far out of our comfort zone. If you don’t have any friends of color, why? I grew up in a diverse city in Iowa – I know, it sounds like an oxymoron. I had access to immigrants, people of color, different religions, diverse cultures. I had access to be friends with people of all kinds, and I was. I have friends of all colors. I’m not friends with them because they have a different hue than me. I’m friends with them because I love them as humans, and I know I do because I didn’t let their skin color hold me back from getting to know them. 
  5. SUPPORT BLACK OWNED BUSINESSES. Take five minutes, google “black owned businesses in ____” and insert your area. You will find a ton of references. Whether it’s trying a new restaurant or shopping at a new boutique, when you support black owned businesses, you’re supporting the people. It’s harder for a Black person to get a bank loan to open that business. When we support them and they thrive, you’re telling banks to invest in those businesses. Money talks, so let yours.
  6. FUCKING LISTEN. This could alternatively be titled SHUT THE FUCK UP. If you’re white, shut your mouth. So often the floor is ceded to us because of our paleness. Our opinions and experiences are treated as more important than those held by less pale people, which is stupid. As a woman, I’ve had to fight to speak and be heard. It can be hard to not talk when given the opportunity because I’m silenced often. It is so important to let people tell their own story and share their own experience. We need to not take up space that should have never been ours to begin with. We have colonized so much of the world, we need to stop colonizing time. 
  7. DON’T APPROPRIATE. At this point in time, I shouldn’t have to say it, but I do. Don’t appropriate. It’s wrong. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, google “cultural appropriation.”
  8. SHARE. It’s really important to share the work, opinions, and experiences of BIPOC. And I mean this in a very works cited kind of way and not an opposite to #6 or #7 kind of way. If there is an artist you love, share! If there’s a writer you love, share! A blogger you’re low-key stalking their life, share! If you love it, other people will too. Everyone loves being loved, so share the love. 
  9. STOP STEREOTYPING BASED ON RACE. I hate this so much. Black people… are not anything. They are people. They are as diverse, multifaceted, interesting, and all the other things humans are as every other “race”. Stereotypes are stupid and should stop. Do not be that person who says things like, “Black people are bad tippers.” I heard that when I bartended. You know why Black people were tipping that person poorly? Because that person was serving them poorly based on a dumb-ass stereotype. That person didn’t deserve a good tip because they were serving like shit. If you start a sentence with “Black people…” it should end with “… are victims of systemic racism.” That is the option. 
  10. ASK TO BE CALLED OUT. I tell all my friends to, “call me out if I say something offensive, hurtful, inaccurate, uneducated, whatever.” No matter what or who they are. I want to be the best person I can be, and I can only be that person by being accountable. I want and hope all my friends will hold me responsible and call me out if I say some shit. I don’t want to be the person who hurts anyone, and I can’t know something until I know something. I surround myself with smart, amazing, vibrant people, and they have access to all sorts of information I have yet to access. When we open ourselves up to being responsible for hurting others or making them feel small or perpetuating horrible things, we allow ourselves to have innumerable teaching moments. When I open myself to the fact I can and will make mistakes, I’m less defensive, hurt, contradictory when I am called out. To create change, I have to be open to being the change, and I can’t be the change if I think I’m omniscient and all-kind. There is power in the vulnerability of allowing myself to be wrong. It is a kindness to others because I give them the space to feel their feelings knowing I will listen and accept responsibility in my role of shitty person. It enables open dialogue and deeper human connection. (You can also be the person to call out your friends and family in a kind but firmly don’t-be-a-racist-dick-noodle way.)
  11. DON’T BE THE PERSON WHO CONFINES THEIR DATING LIFE TO YOUR OWN RACE. This is very specific. It bothers me when people say they’re not attracted to Black men/women or any other race. Sexuality is weird, I get it. If you’re not attracted to Black men, you don’t have eyes (but if you don’t have eyes, color doesn’t exist to you in the same way it does to seeing people). If you’re not attracted to Black men, you’ve never seen: Taye Diggs, Idris Elba, Daniel Kaluuya, Barack Obama, Michael B. Jordan, Chadwick Boseman, Anthony Mackie, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Jessie (the Director of Security at my building in Chicago, and the only regret I have in life: not asking him out). If you’re not attracted to Black women, you’ve never seen Michelle Obama (they are an attractive couple), Iman, Kerry Washington, Halle Berry, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Beyoncé, Gabrielle Union, Kamala Harris, Tiffany Hadish, and more. I find them all unbelievably attractive. Science would also agree with me because they’re very symmetrical. I can honestly name more attractive people of color than I can name white people. Just date people, don’t limit yourself. 

Don’t limit yourself. That should be number one on the list. Being racist means limiting yourself. The world is not white. It would be so boring if it were. It is gloriously colorful. Soak up the world for everything it is, the good and the bad. Where there is bad, there is room for growth. Where there is good, there is room for better. Let’s be better citizens of the world and neighbors to our Black brothers and sisters (and BIPOC in general), who deserve to live in this beautifully colorful world with the same rights and peace as white men. I would say me, but the feminist in me says there is room to reach. 

bisous und обьятий,
RaeAnna

Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”4080530″]

Experiences, Travel

Oak Alley Plantation

I’ve been lazy. I haven’t been keeping up with blog posts like I intend to. So this is about three months after I visited Oak Alley, but better late than never. Also it’s super old. Things don’t change that quickly. The grass has probably been cut, and that’s about it.

DSC_0745-01.jpeg
Walking in the grass at Oak Alley Plantation in Vacherie, Louisiana. | Dress

DSC_0963-01.jpeg
Roots of a live oak and the big house at Oak Alley Plantation.

20190516759409790594632105.jpg

Oak Alley is just one of those places. It is absolutely stunning; so much so, it has become iconic. The grounds are an hour outside of New Orleans in Vacherie. Driving between NOLA and Vacherie gives you a good idea of what rural Louisiana looks like. What used to be a running plantation is now a museum with a restaurant and inn serving as a reminder of the American South’s unfortunate history.

201905163753114479262802721.jpg
Standing in between the rows of live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation. | Dress | Jean Jacket | Sandals

I remember driving passed Oak Alley at fourteen. My family was visiting relatives after Katrina, and we spent a day driving around the countryside outside of New Orleans. It was dusk when we drove by stopping just outside the front gate. The house was lit up from the outside at the end of a path lined by ancient live oak trees. It was magnificent, and a vision I will never forget. It wasn’t until I was in New Orleans for a bachelorette party a few years ago that I actually toured the plantation. The house is beautiful, but the grounds are the truly wonderful aspect. The plantation earned its name from the twenty-eight live oaks lining a walkway up to the front door of the house. It features a guided tour of the “Big House,” a slavery exhibit, a sugar cane exhibit, and more. There is a restaurant and inn on the grounds. The restaurant has some seriously amazing bread pudding. The gift shop also has some amazing pralines. If you’re lucky, you can have some warm and fresh.

DSC_1063-01.jpeg
View of the big house and the live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation.

Some of the oak trees are almost three hundred years old. The larger branches extend and drop to the ground. The roots are knotty and huge. Spanish moss grows on the trees. When the light hits them just right, it’s what bayou dreams are made of. Movies and pictures will never do it justice.

 

DSC_0861-01.jpeg
Roots and live oaks at Oak Alley Plantation.

Oak Alley was a sugar cane plantation built on the suffering of slaves. Sugar cane was known as white gold because of how much it was worth. Growing, harvesting, and refining was back breaking and dangerous. Slaves were bought and sold, so people could have their sugar. In those days, there was rich, then there was sugar cane rich. Oak Alley was the latter. The history goes back almost 200 years, but the live oak trees are even older than that. Walking the grounds is simultaneously enchanting and haunting. It’s difficult to think about how one place can be home to so much beauty and misery. All history is fraught with abuse, but it should never be overlooked. Remembering what really happened is an important part of embracing history.

Shop the Post
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”3583844″]

201905168434728585380580253.jpg