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Length 279
Quick Review Aziz Ansari is as confused with the world of love and dating as the rest of us are, so he wrote a book about it.
Love is tough. Kinda like life. Love, dating, relationships, breakups, and marriage (probably not in that order) have changed in my [dating] lifetime, and it has certainly changed over the past couple of generations. Aziz Ansari decided to write Modern Romance about the conditions people face when existing in the dating world. He worked with researchers so it would be more than observational humor. There is a lot of science in this one and some laughs.
Ansari begins with the basics of what dating used to be like. For a woman: Need man or die. For a man: Need woman or no babies, no help, no food, no sex, no one to come home to. 🙁 Dating changed, but still had some of those basic elements in the last century. Most people married for love instead of need, but the marriage age was far lower and people made due with who was in the viscinity. Now, marriage is not necessary for survival. People are searching for soul mates instead of a good enough mate. Also, the internet. Game changer in Modern Romance because there weren’t tons of options outside of the ‘where I am located.’ Now, internet dating and apps make the WHOLE world open.
One thing I really appreciate is Ansari went out of his way to acknowledge how love and dating is still different for men and women, “If you were a woman, you had far less time to find a man. True love? This guy has a job and a decent mustache. Lock it down, girl.” No shit. Romance is still different for women today because, well, lots of reasons. Ansari did not make it seem like everything is the same for men and women because it’s not.
The book explored dating in the United States and the world through focus groups in New York, Tokyo, Paris, and Buenos Aires. There were also conversations had with women in Qatar and other places in the U.S. Honestly, the dating scene sounds pretty horrific in Tokyo, Buenos Aires, and Qatar. The focus groups and science helped bring a lot of credence to what Ansari was saying, and it also proves a lot of personal observations to be fact and not just observations.
Modern Romance isn’t all just science and statistics. It’s pretty funny. Ansari has a tendency towards hilarious and prolonged tangents. If you’ve ever heard me tell a story, this is something I do and appreciate. I also discovered, Ansari and I have a similar approach to choosing restaurants and a passion for food. Although, I don’t think this is terrible special considering everyone I spend time around has an incredible passion for the culinary arts.
Side Notes:
- Aziz, I hope it worked out for you and the juicer.
- Statistic: iPhone users are twice as likely to sext as Android users. Android users are by and large nerdier than iPhone users. We (Android users) have less opportunity or second party interest to sext…. It’s not our fault.
- The young, body, sex positive women give me so much hope. I wish I had that kind of confidence at their age.
All in all, Modern Romance was not at all what I expected. It was very interesting and funny. I wouldn’t say I learned a ton, but I read a whole bunch. I’ve also done my fair share of dating the old fashioned way and via technology, so the love truths were duhs from me.
Memorable Quotes
“Today, if you own a smartphone, you’re carrying a 24-7 singles bar in your pocket.”
“Nowadays the Internet is my chubby friends. It is the whole world’s chubby friend.”
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Title: Modern Romance
Author: Aziz Ansari
With: Eric Klinenberg
Publisher: Penguin Press (Penguin Random House/Penguin Group)
Copyright: 2015
ISBN: 9781594206276
